Hey there stefan,

First off, id just like to say that i totally understand how you feel. For me i believe that ive always had anxiety, but what really triggered it and made it worse was the drug propecia. Anyway it started with a panic attack that i never came down from. Everything seemed off and weird and pointless. Like i was in a dream. It was the scariest thing ive ever experienced. Then the instrusive thoughts came. Then the physical symptoms. Headaches, dizzyness, chills, panic attacks…you name it.

I also had an enormous fear of losing my mind or having bipolar or chronic depression. I used to have severe health anxiety, always believing that there was some serious thing wrong with me. Only to find out im perfectly healthy. Now, i still have a lot of physical symptoms, but my fear of them is almost completely gone. My depression is gone, my thoughts dont scare me, and i focus on other things in my life.

Now i understand that outside stresses can bother you an make anxiety a lot worse. But its your reaction to those strsses that creates anxiety. When you see yourself reacting badly to stress, just take a step back and be mindful that this is life. Its always stressful and hard but if its something you cant control, dont stress it. Thats a HUGE part of what helped me. DO NOT try to control what is uncontrollable.

Okay, so the one thing that helped me get to this place…and is still helping me is a man named Paul David. His website is called anxietynomore.com look it up and trust me when i say he is a lifesaver. You dont have to pay anything (unless you want to read his book, which i say is worth it. I actually bought the anxietynomore app which includes the book) Paul suffered for 10 years before e realized how to help himself. The answer is acceptance. It sounded stupid to me. I didnt understand it at first. Basically, anxiety feeds off of fear. If you are constantly inside your mind and analyzing how you feel, you will feel disconnected and highly anxious. Depression is common because you spend so much time stressing on how yo feel that your mind gets tired and emotions shut off. Its just a tired mind. Paul describes it like this:

If you break your leg, are you gonna stress and worry about how your leg is broken and how you cant do anything? Or are you gonna live with it and let it heal. Thats what pauls message is. You MUST let everything be there. Fighting this will only dig the hole deeper. Trust me, i did this for 2 months before i found paul. And even then it took me another 2 months for it to truly sink in. But please dont be discouraged on how long it might take for yo to recover. The aim is to no longer care about anxiety. Once that happens, anxiety will have no reason to be there and wil leave by itself. Youll start finding days where you wont even have a thought about how you feel. Those days will turn to weeks. There will be ups and downs and believe me when i say i thought that i had beaten anxiety only to have it hit with full force once again. But then i remembered pauls advice and decided to not let it take over my life.

Its up to you stefan. Self pity and ruminating about whats wrong in your life is not the way to do this. I cant stress enough how important positivity is. If you dont feel positive, dont get stressed about that. The point here is to be ok with however you feel.

Lastly, on pauls website youll see a tab at the top that says blog. That blog is EXTREMELY helpful. There are many other people who are suffering just like you and all they do is support each other. Its extremely inspiring. Its pauls blog but just click on the comments on his most recent post and start commenting if youd like, people are very friendly. Youll see me on there from time to time.

Remember. Its all upto you. This is YOUR life. And YOUR story. Dont let anything control it. Realize that there is a reality as well as a percieved reality. Always know the difference and stress will find you no more. It will take time but its all a journey and you will find moments that will make life worth it. I promise you. If you need anything else dont hesistate to message me or find me on facebook. Just look up kevin venkatesh. I wish you the best man