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Kevin venkatesh

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Viewing 6 posts - 1 through 6 (of 6 total)
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  • #69113
    Kevin venkatesh
    Participant

    @Stephan Alex Lay

    Honestly, you would be surprised what kind of health problems stress/anxiety can cause. Even when you arent feeling particularly stressed or anxious, your body is. Trust me, I have been having random headaches, chest pains, breathing problems, palpitations, blurry vision, dizziness all throughout the day. The more I think and worry about them, the more I fear them and the worse they get. However, If i accept that it is anxiety and just get on with my day, I almost forget that I have anxiety sometimes. The symptoms go away on their own. Now if all of your tests are normal then Im positive that its stress/anxiety. Im guilty of paying more attention to the symptoms recently. But that just shows that this is an up and down rollercoaster but eventually it will get better. I know it will. Having the right attitude is so key, Stephan. You can get better and you will. Seriously, give the blog and website I mentioned in my first comment a look. It may just change your whole outlook on your issues.

    Looking forward to hear from you, Stephan. Let us know of any progress.

    #68732
    Kevin venkatesh
    Participant

    Also, i really want to point out that avoidance of anything is not going to help at all and is counterproductive. Im still guilty of avoidance as i avoid talking to people i want to talk to. But everything else (my job,school etc…) i do it anyway. I feel the anxiety and do it anyway. Its the only way the desensitize from it. Quitting your job because of anxiety is avoidance. And i can understand if you need some breathing room now. But its something you should be mindful of never doing. If you quit a job because you hate it, thats fine but if its because of anxiety, thats avoidance and thats what contributes to the cycle.

    #68730
    Kevin venkatesh
    Participant

    Hey there stefan,

    First off, id just like to say that i totally understand how you feel. For me i believe that ive always had anxiety, but what really triggered it and made it worse was the drug propecia. Anyway it started with a panic attack that i never came down from. Everything seemed off and weird and pointless. Like i was in a dream. It was the scariest thing ive ever experienced. Then the instrusive thoughts came. Then the physical symptoms. Headaches, dizzyness, chills, panic attacks…you name it.

    I also had an enormous fear of losing my mind or having bipolar or chronic depression. I used to have severe health anxiety, always believing that there was some serious thing wrong with me. Only to find out im perfectly healthy. Now, i still have a lot of physical symptoms, but my fear of them is almost completely gone. My depression is gone, my thoughts dont scare me, and i focus on other things in my life.

    Now i understand that outside stresses can bother you an make anxiety a lot worse. But its your reaction to those strsses that creates anxiety. When you see yourself reacting badly to stress, just take a step back and be mindful that this is life. Its always stressful and hard but if its something you cant control, dont stress it. Thats a HUGE part of what helped me. DO NOT try to control what is uncontrollable.

    Okay, so the one thing that helped me get to this place…and is still helping me is a man named Paul David. His website is called anxietynomore.com look it up and trust me when i say he is a lifesaver. You dont have to pay anything (unless you want to read his book, which i say is worth it. I actually bought the anxietynomore app which includes the book) Paul suffered for 10 years before e realized how to help himself. The answer is acceptance. It sounded stupid to me. I didnt understand it at first. Basically, anxiety feeds off of fear. If you are constantly inside your mind and analyzing how you feel, you will feel disconnected and highly anxious. Depression is common because you spend so much time stressing on how yo feel that your mind gets tired and emotions shut off. Its just a tired mind. Paul describes it like this:

    If you break your leg, are you gonna stress and worry about how your leg is broken and how you cant do anything? Or are you gonna live with it and let it heal. Thats what pauls message is. You MUST let everything be there. Fighting this will only dig the hole deeper. Trust me, i did this for 2 months before i found paul. And even then it took me another 2 months for it to truly sink in. But please dont be discouraged on how long it might take for yo to recover. The aim is to no longer care about anxiety. Once that happens, anxiety will have no reason to be there and wil leave by itself. Youll start finding days where you wont even have a thought about how you feel. Those days will turn to weeks. There will be ups and downs and believe me when i say i thought that i had beaten anxiety only to have it hit with full force once again. But then i remembered pauls advice and decided to not let it take over my life.

    Its up to you stefan. Self pity and ruminating about whats wrong in your life is not the way to do this. I cant stress enough how important positivity is. If you dont feel positive, dont get stressed about that. The point here is to be ok with however you feel.

    Lastly, on pauls website youll see a tab at the top that says blog. That blog is EXTREMELY helpful. There are many other people who are suffering just like you and all they do is support each other. Its extremely inspiring. Its pauls blog but just click on the comments on his most recent post and start commenting if youd like, people are very friendly. Youll see me on there from time to time.

    Remember. Its all upto you. This is YOUR life. And YOUR story. Dont let anything control it. Realize that there is a reality as well as a percieved reality. Always know the difference and stress will find you no more. It will take time but its all a journey and you will find moments that will make life worth it. I promise you. If you need anything else dont hesistate to message me or find me on facebook. Just look up kevin venkatesh. I wish you the best man

    #67483
    Kevin venkatesh
    Participant

    Hi steve,

    Let me tell you what i do. First, accept. Dont be so bummed that this is happening. Feeling flat or sad is ok its part of life. If you accept those feelings it will take a lot of the stress out of it. However accepting does not mean giving in to the blandness and just sitting at home not doing anything. Im glad to hear that you want to do something about it. Always stay positive. Thats key.

    Meditation definitely helps. So try that. Also in regards to your job. If it feels like a chore, just step back and be mindful of what youre doing. Take everything one step at a time. Im not sure how much you know about mindfulness but it helps you stay in te moment. When you focus on the moment right now, you will feel the stress fade and those feelings will go away when you dont focus on them.
    Sorry i feel like im saying a lot of different things but its a cumulative thing that helps me.
    Just remember: life is too beautiful and too short to waste any time worrying about ANYTHING. Find out what makes you happy. Just do things and see where it takes you.

    All the best,
    Kevin

    #66949
    Kevin venkatesh
    Participant

    Hi sam,

    First off, as keyara said: you are very strong to reach out for help. I cant tell you how many people just fall into a hole they cant get out of because they keep all of their feelings to themselves.

    I will start out by saying that i too have severe anxiety. I had an episode a few months back that left me depersonalized, out of it, stressed and detatched. I felt like i was in a dream and i hated it. I had terrible thoughts that scared me to death. Then i found help. I reccomend you look up paul david and his anxietynomore website. It will certainly help with the anxiety. The anxiety bothers me very little now.

    As for all of your external problems, all i can say is to keep going. Everything that is happening toyou is not meant to overshadow you. Its your life, your choice. Life is way way too short to live like that. Quit the job if you hate it, trust me working at a job you hate will have bad effects on you physically and mentally. I also reccommend meditation. It may seem rediculous at first but it helps manage stress. Just realize that all this will make you stronger, but only if you wish to be. Dont have any self pity and realize that its okay to feel insecure, depressed and anything else. It means youre alive. Keep on going and just have faith that life will be better in the future. If you have any questions please feel free to ask. Im learning new things everyday about how to handle life and would be glad to share.

    Kevin

    #65444
    Kevin venkatesh
    Participant

    Hi sarah jane,

    First off, i am very sorry to hear about your problems. I wish i could magically heal you but the truth is its gonna take time. Now, i havent been in your place. What i have been suffering from for a while is severe anxiety. With it comes disturbing thoughts, depression, feeling detached, chronic fatigue and aches. Stress can cause major symptoms as louise said, such as fatigue, pain, anxiety, and other symptoms. Im always tired and get aches everywhere. My mind is constantly churning out new thoughts about rubbish. Its very surprising how close our thoughts correlate to how we feel. Ive learnt that just by changing my attitude, my mood shifts. If i think, “im going to be like this for the rest of my life”, which i did at one point, then chances are i probably will be if i keep thinking like that. But as soon as i thought “i feel terrible now, but i will accept that this is me until i get better”.
    There is a man named paul david who helped me tremendously. He suffered from anxiety/depression for 10 years until he learned how to get rid of it. The key is acceptance. Realizing that all your thoughts an feelings and just that and NOT REAL. It takes time for that to sink in but its true. Its upto YOU to make your life enjoyable. Life doesnt care about how you feel. You gotta just let everything come at you while moving forward. Another thing that helps is to take some time out of your day and write down or just think about what IS good in your life and what you should be thankful for. If you have family and friends who love you, be thankful. Those are the people you live for and they live for you.

    Now i know im not a doctor or therapist or anything, but im learning new things everyday just from experience. Now i havent experienced what you have to that extent to be honest but i believe that the advice i have taken should be taken by everyone. Be greatful, accept, dont take your thoughts/feelings too seriously, accept yourself for now. Also, dont try to put on a mask. Hiding this is trying to control. I was afraid to let everything in because i thought i would lose control over myself and that id fall into a hole. Well thats when everything turned around. Let it in but you have to change your mindset. You can do it i know you can. Im rambling because theres so much i can say but dont give up. Dont ever give up. In the end theres always something worth living for. If youre going through hell keep going. In the end youll be strong.

    Kevin
    Ps. Check out anxietynomore.co.uk (paul davids site) it will help i promise.

Viewing 6 posts - 1 through 6 (of 6 total)