David,

When you wake up in the morning, how do you start your days? What are your rituals? Are they productive, or are they things you do that are non-essential? Perhaps changing your ritual in the morning and start off fresh and energized. Watch some clips off youtube, read, listen to positive music. Try external stimuli and expose yourself to positive and inspirational stuff. Surprisingly this will start to change your mental patterns.

You need to start doing and less thinking. It sounds crazy, but sometimes our thoughts become our worst enemy. We need to learn to drop our thoughts, and by doing so we drop our expectations for others and fears; learning to live here and now consciously. Being in our thoughts we get consumed by the ego, and the ego isn’t you. It’s the other you that is holding you back. By acknowledging this and we begin to understand that it is thought that is the enemy. Learn to let go of those thoughts, and you will begin to let go of negativity/fear.

Why do you drive people away with negativity? Why would you choose options out of fear when you can choose love? Sometimes what you choose to do and think reflects back to you. Think negative and act negative, you attract negative experiences and outcomes. Why would you want that? Instead choose love and positivity. It’s hard to adjust this mental pattern, but realize you always have two options: love or fear. Love being positive and fear being negative.

What is it in that first step in taking that you are afraid of? Exposing your “you” to others? You need to learn to embrace this, and also know that it’s okay to mess up and make mistakes. I think a lot of us are scared to act on new things because we are afraid to to do something wrong because it shows us that we are incapable. But truly, this is where we learn and grow, is by making mistakes. So if you’re afraid to take that first step for this reason, you need to move past that and know that in order to grow and try new things, you need to face the fact that failure is going to happen. But how do you bounce back is the bigger question.

I think, to start, is to adjust your mental schematics and consciously be aware of the negativity that floats in your head; the self-talk. Expose yourself to positive and influential forms of media that will bring you up instead of bringing you down. This is a start at least.

Hope you get progress with this buddy, and all the best to you.

Cheers,

Spidey