Dear OV,
I’m distraught that you called the relationship abusive because this guy was pulling away while slowly losing someone he loved. Through this entire post, you said nothing about his feelings, only yours in relation to his behavior. This means that the relationship that you may eventually have with this man will be completely dependent on how you “feel” and not about the two of you. This means that at this time you are unable to give to a relationship in the amount that is necessary in choosing to love. Take some time, work with the therapist. Right now you are too selfish for a relationship, but when you are truly strong that will fade and live will boom in your life. Good luck!