My own therapist said I should have no regrets and shouldn’t let him keep me from doing whatever I wanted with my life, since I wasn’t his girlfriend. Why the hell did I listen… I thought that looming feeling of guilt was the thing I should defy and beat. Now I see it was a friend I should have listened to. I thought doing this meant reinforcing myself… now I only see it as ignoring my values, my inner self.
I was pure evil. I betrayed and abandoned him. I hate myself for what I did.