Thank you ladies for your wise words. I had thought I had forgiven but I think you’re right Doreen I’m still holding on and I need to let go if we’re to move forward. I’m letting my fears drive me, which isn’t healthy.

Maggie he did go to counselling for this. Though he hadn’t told me, he couldn’t deal with what he had done. So for the first time in his life he went to a counselor . This was one of the things that did provide me with a bit of comfort that he wasn’t a bad guy, just done a bad thing.

I think I will have to learn to be patient. To see what happens in our story but make sure I don’t stick my head in the sand if no more trust develops.