Ivan,

I understand that this is important for you because this is bringing about emotional turmoil for your girlfriend. That can be hard to deal with as I’m sure she is emotionally upset about the situation. I’d like to acknowledge your caring, kind nature to take action on her behalf. I agree with Yue that there isn’t much you can do about another’s behavior, especially someone not necessarily close with you. Unless that’s not the case and you are close.

One practice I could recommend for both you and your girlfriend is a forgiveness practice. Take time to visualize him on a stage with you in the audience. Imagine the negative behaviors and say to yourself, “I forgive you. I’m sorry. I love you.” Everyone on some level is a reflection of an aspect of ourselves, thus the “I’m sorry” part. This is similar to ho’oponopono or a version of it. Feel free to look that up and read about the benefits. Forgiveness in any form is a powerful way to transform your life and others without having to get into gnarly conversations that inadvertently leave individuals hurt and resentful.

Does this help?

Many blessings,
Paula