I second the advice to talk to her.

I also think you might be psyching yourself out a little. This only came up when you studied counselling and the potential problems people from difficult backgrounds have, right? Well, you should know that there are also many people with difficult childhoods and traumas that lead pretty ordinary lives.

If your self-esteem is an issue then that’s worth working on, for sure. But don’t assume you’re unable to love just because you don’t like yourself. You don’t have to be enlightened before you can love someone else. You just need to be willing.

Good luck.