Dear George, continued:
Regarding your third paragraph: self empathy. As children we blame ourselves for our parent’s rejection, meaning we start hating ourselves… the opposite of self empathy. Sometime along the way- and maybe you can have glimpses of it already- you can start feeling empathy for yourself. Somewhere along the way, you will finally understand on a deep level that there was nothing wrong with little George, that there was and is something wrong with your father. You will see that you were innocent and that you meant only good- wanting to love and be loved. that is all you wanted from him. how can that be wrong?

Please post again, George- let me know how you are doing, anytime. I will respond within 24 hours if my internet works and I am in town and doing well enough myself.

take care:
anita