Dear mossyyogi:
My input is about one point: being judgmental vs. evaluative. To evaluate whehter is is good for us to be involved with this or that particular other person is necessary for self interest and self protection. If his use of drugs hurt you and will hurt you if you are in an intimate relationship with him- then don’t be. It doesn’t mean that you have to be drug free to get to that decision and it doesn’t mean that he having used drugs means he is a totally bad person. Forming the evaluation that being involved with a person with his drug habits is hurting you- is a valid evaluation.You are not making a universal judgment, a potical decleration etc. You are only making a personal, subjective evaluation of what is effective/ workable for you and what is not.
anita