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Reply To: Jealousy issues – not ready for serious relationship ?

HomeForumsRelationshipsJealousy issues – not ready for serious relationship ?Reply To: Jealousy issues – not ready for serious relationship ?

#77924
Flower
Participant

Hi Julie,

I just read your story, a few things stood out, the first main one was that he refused to cut contact with a girl who was sending him naked pictures… (im a woman btw) im sorry but thats really not on. only friends with no limits would do that. on the other hand perhaps he chose to keep her as a strength test for you. that is really testing your limits of trust. and i say good on you for sticking in there and trusting. but if it makes you uncomfortable (and rightly so) tell him she has to go, and not for not trusting him but who can trust their a woman who sends naked pics to a man with GF!!!

i think you need to keep working on yourself as you said you would and particulary on your self esteem, that cliche that says you cant love someone until you love yourself is 100% true. you need to be in the relationship happy, not co-dependent, you need to be confident and with enough love for yourself that is anything would take you boyfriend away from you, you would be ok. you would still be you, you would still love you.

i think one of the best exercises for this is being caring and create intimacy with yourself, staring yourself in the eye in a mirror for a few minutes a day, medidtate, be alone. reward yourself when you do good, make an effort to create some positive self talk within yourself. the more you love and care for you, the less you will be worried with your partner running off because you will be secure and sue in yourself that there is no one more wonderful and lovable than you!

I dont think you should end it because you have insecurities you can work on them while in a relationship and as you said this feels like mr right to you.

in terms of always something better, my ex acted like that and it was actually offensive to me! i chose him, no one forced me with him, he ticked all my boxes, i ddidnt need anyone taller, musclier or smarter i just wanted him, his insecurities ended up driving me away.

i wish you all the best and hope something of what ive said here is encouraging 🙂
xxxx