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Reply To: An issue of attraction.

HomeForumsRelationshipsAn issue of attraction.Reply To: An issue of attraction.

#78103
Kat
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Thanks for replying Anita! Our sex life was good, even if we didn’t have as much sex as I would have liked. He explained that the lack of sexual attraction was part of the reason we didn’t have sex as often as I would have liked. When we did have sex it was passionate and intimate for me, everything I could want truly. We were always up front about what we liked/disliked and respectful of each other. As far as I knew we both have always been very honest with each other. This was the first time I was thrown for a loop. He told me our sex life was better by far than his previous relationships in terms of it’s intimacy and our eagerness to please each other, yet he couldn’t understand why he wasn’t as attracted to me as some of his previous girlfriends. I’m not sure what to make of that. The girlfriends before that he found sexually attracted were both unhealthy relationships. One had borderline personality disorder and would threaten him regularly, the other never loved him. I don’t think they were bad people, one is a close friend of mine, but I know he was deeply unhappy in those relationships. I suppose I can see why both of them could be deemed more attractive than me, but my attractiveness has never been a concern of mine till now. I understand we are far more than our looks and we should cultivate our inner beauty most of all, of course this doesn’t stop me from feeling insecure every now and then. Yet now I am certainly more self conscious of my looks. Thank you for letting me vent all this, it’s painful for me to think about. I don’t care if the whole world finds me attractive, but I do care about my significant other finding me desirable every once and a while. 🙁