@IanTing – This is my belief, If my ex-girlfriend wanted me back/wanted each other in our lives again, than it shouldn’t matter what was said in the past. The past is the past, can’t change it. So why should we suffer over things that are in the past, unless my ex felt that going to counseling would help her and I, then I would go with her. If she doesn’t feel we need to go to counseling together then we could both work on a future relationship without a mediator, I am just fine with either choice. My ex & I have said some hurtful things to each other when we’ve been angry but that has only happened twice in the past 5 years and I think that’s very normal, given that there are some really crazy & emotionally abusive relationships out there that are happening on a daily bases. My ex and I never called each other horrible names. Well, I know I haven’t. I was always good to my ex and I loved her a lot but she cut all contact and left me in the dark because she wasn’t ready for her family to know about us, not knowing how to go about our relationship because of cutting contact with me anyway. So therefore, I had to make decisions on my own. Since she was the one who cut contact and changed her number on me more than once, it is only appropriate & normal for her to make the move in contacting me now. I’m a positive person and know that I can achieve a healthy relationship with anyone, as long as the person that is with me is willing to have a healthy relationship too with trust & communication.

I don’t feel comfortable reaching out to my ex since I’ve already done that in the past many times, it’s her turn now to show me whether she wants me in her life or not. If my ex loves me, she will contact me and if she doesn’t then things will just stay as they are. My Mom has even told me ” If Angela really loves you, she will be the one calling you and texting you. You’ve already done enough in the past.” My mom is right and she knows what’s best, so I’m sticking to that.

So in saying that, I can only go off from my own personal experience. You don’t need to worry about the friends and what has been said as they are not the ones you are trying to re-connect with, you just need to worry your ex & about the present, formulate a plan on how you want to go about contacting her. You don’t need to fear anything, just the word fear itself. I keep reading what you wrote earlier and it seems like a good idea that you contact her so that way you can stop suffering, watch you get a hold of her and things go right. Then you wasted all your energy and time on worrying for nothing. It’s obvious that in your heart you want to speak to her, so go ahead. You’ve got nothing to lose but time hun.

I wish you all the best, positivity, love & light!

(((hugs)))

E.