Why do you bully yourself? What is the bully’s motivation? Is there a benefit to it? A payoff? What do you get from bullying yourself? If you only suffer because of it, why don’t you… just stop?

1. I’m not aware I am bullying myself or I have sense that someone has to do it. I can’t go unbullied. That would be chaos.
2. The bully thinks he is just acting on behalf of the mafia boss, like a hitman.
3. I get a satisfaction from keeping my other inner selves downtrodden. They (the downtrodden ones stay lovebale because they never get a big ego. And then I mostly identify with these cute, seemingly harmless ones. I think I come from a family culture/Christian culture that encourages harmless, non-assertive, compliant behaviour. I was rewarded for that behaviour when I was a child. My mother once said of me:”Oh Jack, you were such a placid child!” And so it was my job to be placid, one reason being that my next eldest brother was disabled and far from being placid.
4. I just needed someone’s help to identify them and objectify the situation.