So here is the update.

We agreed we would watch a movie together in the evening yesterday when she would come home from work. When she came home I offered her some tea so we sat down in the kitchen and talked. We ended up talking from 10pm to 2am when I went to sleep, because the conversaation was starting to fizzle out and I wanted to remember the evening for how we had a really good conversation and not the silence.

We started like usually with lots of joking and laughing but because I wanted to take the opportunity to get to know her on a deeper level I started to ask her a little more personal questions. I asked her what are her worries. We talked about our exes. She was a little hesitant at first, because as I suspected she is quite shy, but as I opened up so did she as she saw I trully listen.

She talked about how she sometimes feels of little value, how she is insecure in her current relationship and how her current bf in esence just brushes it off when she brings it up with him. Another woman was kind of involved with him but she does not know for sure. She only saw some weird facebook messages from him to a girl he went out to party with, saying how he is thinking about her and he would be glad if they could go out together but if not he wants for her to have a happy life. In my book this is a weird thing to say to another girl but it is not really straight up evidence for cheating. She did immidiately bring it up with him but he just said nothing happened.

She also told me she has an inferiority complex regarding her proffesional success. As I battled with a similar situation I tried to offer her some advice but I was really not trying to bash her relationship and was just lending an ear.

We did give a lot of compliments to each other. Me calling her very smart and very kind and I did say a couple of times how cute she is when she smiled and such stuff, and she also complimented my looks, how interesting I am and how she loves to listen to me because what I have to say is really smart.

I think it was a really great evening. I think we connected on a deeper level and I think she now knows I can not only make her laugh but she also knows how deep I trully am and that I am more than willing to lend an attentive ear whenever she needs it.

Also after yesterday I see here in a different light. I think she is even better than I could have dreamed off and I realized we really do have a bunch of things in common. We like the same stuff we hate the same stuff, we aspire to the same stuff and I really do think I am starting to have strong feelings for this girl. I just think she is perfect. This is where my head starts shutting off and I am really writing with my heart. I also stopped having any anxiety. I do wish to be with her but all of a sudden this is not so important. I somehow just want her to be happy. When I see her happy I am extremely happy. She trully is my sunshine and even if she stays with her current boyfriend I do not feel like I am any worse off. I cant really explain it because it is such a strange and novel feeling for me. I have never felt something like this.

Thanks for reading. Have a great day.
Matic