I never thought about all this. I lost my loving feelings for my boyfriend, though, before the abuse started, before I got incredibly frustrated. It took a long time, many months, of wondering if I could spend my life with this man. We had a loving kind relationship up until then, actually. As far as sexually, no, lol, I am not aggressive sexually. I am actually more sensual than sexual, which was the problem, because he’s more sexual than sensual. Difficult match.

As far as other relationships with other men, I never was in a relationship like this one, so I’m not sure there’s a pattern. Most of the men I’ve been with have been strong-willed, and I was the one who was the needy one. This one was completely different.