Dear Pria,

I’m sorry to hear what has happened. When these things happen, they catch us off-guard and we can’t quite do things the same anymore. What we need to do is acknowledge our wound….our pain and suffering…and know that it is ok to accept the pain. It is just like grief…we will go through cycles of unhappiness, loneliness, anger, resentment…and it will take time. Allow yourself time to heal. Allow yourself to be yourself. It takes time to build the trust again.

Also you can ask yourself the question “what is true love?”. True love cannot be just defined by our physical appearance or actions, but rather it is our deep commitment to another person. From your post, it sounds to me that your husband still truly and dearly loves you but he made a mistake in his life. You have known him for 14 years, which is 5,110 days….he made a mistake just once…so the probability of him making a mistake again is 1/5110 or 0.019%…a very very low probability. He hasn’t ran away from his responsibilities as a father and as a husband, so he still truly cares.

I think the best thing you can do is to now focus on your child. Watch how your child grows up everyday…learn new skills…give new expressions. When you dedicate your love unconditionally to your child, you are also give love to your husband. You don’t need to force yourself to say or do anything with your husband…when you nourish and care for your child…it will break through the anger and painful seeds stored within yourself. Take it a day at a time, at your own pace.

Take care and I wish you all the best!
Jennifer