Dear Pria,

Reading your last reply, maybe the frustration is coming from a disconnect between your mind and your heart. Your mind says “do not trust him because he did something that hurt me”. Your heart says “he still loves me very much and I see it”. Perhaps take some time to reflect and think how you feel as a whole. When you reflect, accept those emotions & then carry it gently like a child (e.g I am feeling resentment…but its ok that I feel it after all…this feeling will pass shortly). Don’t judge yourself for feeling no trust. You are doing your best at this point in time. We are human beings after all. Trust is something that takes time and confidence to build. Unfortunately it is not like a light switch, where you can turn it off or turn it on.

Perhaps you can also think about how your grandparents helped you heal. What was it that they did? The food they cooked, the songs they sang, stories they shared, or something else that made you warm and fuzzy inside? For example, maybe you like eating a good meal. Perhaps you can ask your husband to take you out on a “date” to have a good meal. You can try to make it like your first date with him & leave the past behind for just that time…enjoy the meal, the atmosphere, share some jokes. Humour is another good way to restore broken relationships.

Take it easy…and good luck,
Jennifer