*I’m aware I have no ‘real’ crisis that threatens my life such as war or famine*

You do not need to feel guilty and make excuses for your suffering. Actually this is the worst curse that could happen to you – having to suffer internally and with your soul, and not being able to get the compassion and understanding from other people, they even blame you for your suffering, isn’t this another hit on your sore spot? You have an emotional wound and this is an invisible “skin” aching that is not visible to other people. Sometimes even poor people in the middle of a war or having lost dear people don’t suffer, they can name their pain, give their time for socially accepted grief and move on. This is the eternal invisible suffering which is much harder to experience and to overcome. If you are already considering this, a shrink would be a good option for you. Trust me, I speak as both ex psychology student and long time patient. I can mirror your situation – being a female, emotionally abused, neglected and blackmailed by my mother, and mimicking behavior from my younger sister. I have tried really hard to change the dynamic of relationship with my mother until I found out that at her age, and when she not only don’t se anything wrong with her behavior, but also tries to place the blame on me. My sister being younger is a different story and I believe I lately can see changes in her since she turned to religion and turned her behavior from abusing people and egocentricity, to helping people in need.