Dear Masood Khan:

Thank you for the Btw. I think your goal makes a lot of sense: you recognize your childhood loneliness, your excess (too much for your own good) need for others paying you attention, affection and validating you. You want to be more self sufficient, less needy, more independent, emotionally. I agree with you that this kind of independent is important for your happiness, your well being. So… you are in a good place in that you realize, you fully understand what it is that you need.

You used the word “dread” in your last post above, and that is the obstacle in your way. Fear. Basically you are asking, I believe, how to do what you want to do while you are feeling that dread, that fear.

…Did I mention there is no easy answer to that?

There is a movie I watched a long time ago, The Never Ending Story, the original, 1984. It is about a boy, alone, on his journey to save the land of Fantasia from destruction. It is a symbolic movie, symbolic of an emotional journey. It affected me a lot. Actually, I was in another country, the country I was born at. I always wanted to live in the U.S.A.

After watching that movie, I felt the courage and the inspiration to fly to the U.S for the first time in my life (I was 23 when I watched the movie and 24 when I flew to the U.S), and as a result of watching this inspiring movie, I did it. I flew all by myself, alone.

Sometimes, something gives us the COURAGE, that inspiration, that energy to do what we previously feared of doing. You can’t get that energy by thinking, or reading advice… you can get that courage by something unexpected that MOVES you, that emotionally moves you.

This movie may not be what moves you to do something you couldn’t imagine doing before. It moved me. It may move you. If you would like, you can give it a try. Remember it is a symbolic movie…

anita