Dear humour:

Unresolved issues from the past, if they are significant unresolved issues, they do not go away with time. Certain problem behaviors may stop with time, but deep underlying issues do not go away because they are physically … stuck in the brain in the form of connections between brain cells. We cannot change those connections by will, a decision. The first connections are made when we are children and we have no choice in the matter. For example, if a child is being told or shown that he doesn’t matter, then he forms the connection between brain cells: I don’t matter! (What a child is told and shown, he or she believes automatically). Then over time, as the child grows up, that one connection multiplies and applies to many areas in life: it is no longer only in the context of the relationship with the dismissive parent, but there are connections to all relationships including in the area of a career. Multiple connections all coming from the first.

Healing is about the difficult, slow work of disconnecting and reconnecting brain cells. It is possible and is an amazing process. The brain is an amazing organ!

What do you think?

And if you do think about what I wrote, and if something new occurs to you as a result- there is a new connection you just formed. Healing is about undoing the old untrue (not congruent with reality) connections and making new true connections.

anita