anita –

on considering people are unloving: even though i’ve encountered a handful of people i’ve grown to consider pretty evil, i think that somewhere they have love. maybe not for me but they have it. and i also tend to believe that everything is written so maybe little things like people picking on me or anything of that sort is for a reason. maybe it’s something owed to me from my past life? i’ve been doing a lot of thinking on that. i have no idea who i was or what i’ve done before, but maybe i deserved it.

on being lovable: it’s a really hard thing to believe. the process is going to take a while for me to actually understand and register that i’m able to be loved and lovable, but it’s confusing. it always seems that other people (especially girls) get this kinda wonderful attention where people want to be with them or even just talk to them, and then with me it’s nothing. and it’s even more confusing because some of the people that come to mind can say the same things i say about myself about themselves, but yet and still, they still get that special attention. i could just be no one’s particular type, but i’m pretty fine with being me. i know i can’t be anyone else. actually loving me is taking some time. i keep in mind that nobody’s better than anybody, but would you say many of us are on different kinds of levels? like spiritually?

does the universe really give us what we ask for? no matter how we feel (whether we’re in doubt or sorrow)?