I am a recovering addict and know first hand how my using destroyed several relationships. I believe myself to be a decent person, but when I used drugs nothing mattered to me more than getting high. My word meant nothing ! I would have the best intentions of doing the right thing after the guilt & depression would set in after my latest binge – I truly wanted to not use, but a few days later when people forgave me I would go out and use again. The real change for me occurred when, I admitted to myself(truly admitted) that I needed help, became willing to go to any lengths to stay sober.That meant going into a halfway house and going to meeting daily-working a program with recovering addicts as such as myself. My now wife, we were dating back then told me she would not put up with another relapse, and if I chose to drugs over her than my actions were clear to her what really mattered to me. She would support me in getting clean, but she did not trust me. My actions/words going forward had to equal my words NO matter how small the lie maybe rigorous honesty is a requirement in all my actions. It was by living an this honest life. I finally have regained her trust, but it took some time. I am grateful to say that I am approaching 21 years of sobriety and 20 years of marriage, I have a home and a family that loves me. My suggestion to you would be to join an Al-Anon group. It will do wonders and help you to gain a better understanding of not only the addict. but more so yourself.It is the best gift you can give to yourself.
Take care