Wow, I have goosebumps after reading this thread. Nan, what a challenging time you are going through right now but cling to that hope for the future…that is absolutely amazing that after all these years you have a chance of real love and a life together with your first husband!!! Thank you so much for sharing your story. I think that takes a lot of courage. At 31 years old, I have had a similar re-connection with a first love but I think I was still too immature to appreciate how special it was so I have lost it yet again. Perhaps that’s what these 40 years have given you…the awareness of how special and rare your connection with R-1 is…and with that knowing you won’t lose it again. It’s so scary to have the realization that time is ticking and when it’s gone, it’s gone. This life is YOURS. It’s clear to me that you’ve done so much for the people you love, and have been successful even though you had close people in your life scheming and working against you. I wish so much for you to be happy in any way you choose and I hope to read an update in another few months or even sooner. Hugs, strength, and patience to you. 🙂