My partner is similar as well, so I feel your pain. I think on our first date, the first thing he did was pre-emptively warn me/apologize over his jokes. I’m a very literal person and in the beginning of our relationship, the joking made me VERY hurt and frustrated. But over time I managed to get more used to it and there were a few reasons why. Firstly, he dishes out WAY meaner jokes to his friends than he does to me, so I know he’s holding back out of respect for my sensitivity. And when he does make jokes about me or teases me, it’s largely when we’re alone or just with our families (so in a “safe space” so to speak). So it’s a combination of me getting used to his personality and him changing his behaviour out of respect for my feelings. But trust me it’s still a struggle, I still have to issue him periodic reminders that it’s not a joke if I’m not laughing, and I still feel disrespected sometimes. I don’t have a solution because quite frankly I’m still afraid one day he might go too far and I’ll have to end things, but I hope it never comes to that.

Sadly, a lot of people (men especially) are not taught that the best way to show someone that you like them is plain old kindness and respect. I don’t find anything nice about being mocked or made victim of pranks, it’s rude and disrespectful. I’m continually boggled that we live in a world where being mean can be interpreted as anything other than being mean.