Hi Jerry,

I started dating a man I dated back in 1989 again. We have been back together almost 4 years now, but we live an hour apart so we only see each other once a week. We are both divorced and have been talking about living together, but doubt it will ever happen, he likes having the freedom to do what he wants and thinks I may try to hold him back, but I wouldn’t, I need my freedom too. He has had it tough most of his life and I know that has something to do with it. He always blames himself for our fights, which it IS him. I am not sure if he is just scared or what. Neither one of us wants to get married again, so that is not the problem. I do try to see him sometimes during the week, but I am always the one that mentions it happening. I told him now that I am not asking to stay anymore, if he wants me to stay he has to ask. So far it has happened twice, but doubt it will happen again. Also, I don’t think we are in love anymore, we do definitely love each other. We both tell each other we are the loves of our lives and we want to be together forever, but I am doubtful. I don’t think he will ever be able to give me the kind of love and attention I think I need. I really want us to work, but he doesn’t want to make changes. My heart is breaking…I really want him to be my last