Jamie,

I have pulled away a little from the forum to introvert but your suffering compells me to reply. I know this suffering really well, first hand, the whirlwind of emotion and thought a sociopath can put a soul in is like nothing else. There is no logic, no reason, no emphaty, no compassion, it is unthinkable. Having gone through 3 years of dealing with someone like this, I will agree with Pip and say what was my saving grace was to control myself, namely not read what he wrote, not respond, not offer anything he could grab on to and continue with his behavior. I also had to release my reigns so to say and trust those around me, my parents, my lawyer, the courts, and let them respond succinctly keeping him away from me. When you find youself in this kind of nightmare, it is so important to self-nurture as much as you can. In a way find normalcy and joy in your life independent of this individual. Try to look at it as just another bump to cross, as hard as this may be, once you shift your thinking a little bit, the feelings of peace will start to come. If you nurture yourself so, you will be able to remain strong and calm when you do have to deal with him. When he sees that he no longer has power over you, he will start to pull away, you will become “boring, not a challenge.” My heart goes out to you, dear sister, but your light is strong, you will get past this, just as I have.

To expand on what HeidiPaz said, here is a small tip on how to identify these types of people. Listen to your heart, the gut heart. When a heart is so full of compassion these dark creatures are drawn to this light like moths to a flame. They tell lies, but they can’t “feel” like a normal person feels. One thing that was a clue for me was when my heart opened up to him, he did not see it, he continued to “work” on me with his lies. If I had listened to this tiny hunch, and if I had known this type of person existed, I would have run from him. The past cannot be changed and I am grateful for any experience that comes my way because it helps me grow and mold into the person that I am now, and share with others here and there 🙂

May you have peace, may you have strenght, may you keep joy in your heart.

With light and warmth,
Helen