hallo everyone …
its my second time writing here ..i am really thankful of those who took their time to write for me that helped me alot.” i am 21 and MY EX BF is 25.i am really depressed because of my 3 months relationship.and then break up with my bf.i broke up with him 2 months before because he never show love or effection for me,dint call or text me for 2 to 3 days.he had no time and no emotions for me .he was working in another city which is 35 mints away.
in these 3 months of relationship i was the only one to make every possible effort to communicate .he used to live alone 15 mints away from my room .i used to cook for him daily and called him so that he comes and eat with me and we can spend some time togather.
but he was either on fb checking his news feed or somthing else.even though when i tried to talk to him.often i dint get any responce.i was deeply in love with him.but he was always busy in his own life ..
i did every single thing for him.i cooked ,washed his dresses ,massaged his body feets and hands when he asked me to do every single thing..but in return dint get any good responce when one day i called him i said him i am having like fever and body pain.and he was also nt fine .he had fever .he said he ll come in sometime.after calling two times finally after 3 hours he came to me..and i was so hurt bcz of his reaction because as i wasnt feeling fine,he was punching my body nd slaping my face..and asked me to get up and make food.he said i was doing acing and he doesnt like drama..
after a week his friend came from another city .then he was with him all time dint text me or call me .then he cooked with his friend and dint need me and dint come to see me either.that time he was finding job and room online .in those days i was alone all time .i live alone i was alone ,tol him many time i am feeling so alone but he dint find even 10 mints to meet me for 2 weeks…
it was just once in a blue moon that he said i am important to him and he likes me.
then he got job and went another city as i told in beginning .i used to awake for him late night that may be after job he will msg me but i had to text .and he replied first few days .then whenever i dint text there was no responce from him.and some time he used to call me for 2 to 3 mints for asking hi hello etc..then after two weeks he came to see me.we had good time togather he made me feel good .kissed me etc.
but after going again same attitude and this time also rude.he said he dont want to talk to anyone even not me.and when i asked him why he doesnt reply my texts he said he dont like to update every single thing..even i never asked for any update..i used to weep daily .. after 4 days i called him he was with a girl in her room lying with her in same bed ,sharing blanket at night 11;30. he ll stay wd her tonght,he said .and he started to talk about her body that she has tattos all over body etc.and started to admire her which he never did of mine ..i told him on call that it seems i m nt special for u nd u dnt make me feel wanted or special ..he also said that when he was with me i was like his HABIT.but not now.. thn he said she is having fever right now what should he do?thn he askd me to sleep…i trusted him blindly,,
i was wondering all night whats happning wd me .but dint took this that much serious but i was too hurt..two days passed but he dint contact me.but he was availible on fb i used to check.
then i finallly decided to QUIT .and told him .he dint stop me and wished me best of luck for future……..i dint contact from 14 december 2016 to 31 december 2016 .
on 1st january someone knocked door..i opend so it was he.he asked what is wrong with me.i said nothing thn asked me,am i Happy? that time i was happy without any regret of break up..i rep YES ..thn he said the day i broke up he was weeping a girl saw him they become friends.and after 4 to 5 days she proposed him.he asked her to wait till he meets me and then he ll reply her about her proposal.i was shocked ……
thn i called him second day bcz i loved him alot and i told him all the thing that he dint give me time etc .he made me guilty by saying if a person cant give time then does that mean relationship ends?i broke his trust ,nd now he is in relationship with sombdy else and he commited to her and he cant trust any girl now .he commited wd her last night after meeting me. he said…i was weeping he made me feel so guilty by playing with his words.he said he dint do anything wrong.and i was the one to end relationship he wasnt.and then i was emotionally so broken and said many thing emotionally and sorry him that i loved him madly …he said now nothing will change and he asked me to stay as friends i said NO …i dont want to be friends with him anymore and now we are not going to see and each other …before his going i said him I LOVE you when he was near door..he replied HE LOVED ME….

after that i dint contact him i used to weep all day long and lost 6 kg in last 2 months.he saw me 3 times with another guy.and when i was in NO CONTACT …HE used to text for calling me for dinner or texting me sometime asking some question like ” how did i find him as a person?” i wanted to move on with my life because i knew i deserve better but i was too weak ..thinking about him all the time ..
after break up when he called for dinner i went in his room ..we took dinner and i was sitting so he played a movie ..i agreed to watch with him .during movie .he kept his head on my shoulder ..i thought may b he wants me back …i dint responce much but he kept his head near my neck as he wanted to sleep in my arms so i started to shake his hairs which i used to do always …then after sometime we hugged each othr started kissing..thn meanwhile i asked him about his NEW gf he said he is still in relationship with her and talk to her daily …and does SEX also…thn i was shocked when a person is in relationship with somebody then what is he doing to me
? kissing hugging and sleeping? why ..i asked why he is doing all this to me when he is already commited to somebody else…his replied hurted me alot…he said ,,he wasnt in consious and sorry …
i asked him if he loves me ,he replied he used to love me …his reply was only about past that he loved me ..
i took my cloths and everything i said i am leaving ..he said if u wanna go u can ..thn i reachd at door .he came to me for hugging me and i started weeping bcz i was being played …it was hurting too badly …he said he wont let me go in this way as he loved me once … then we were talking about these things he said if he wouldnt love me then he wouldnt sleep with me ..and then he pushed me away .and went to bed .i went to him and said i just wanted to know if he loves or not etc thn i slept with him but this time not as a lover …i was observing his every actions in some other way in critical way…after 2 hours i had to go for job so i slept an hour thn went to job and then dint contact him..because i undrstood what he was doing nothing just playng me and cheating with new gf..and keeping me as a back up plan.
after 16 days he called again and asked me for dinner .this time i went for dinner took dinner and left ..he wanted to spend some time with me going for walk but i excused him because of my exams..
then he used to call sometime for dinner sometime asking me to do his some work, like doing shopping for him or bring a book …i found these as excuses so that i become in touch with him..
before one week we had dinner he lives now little far from my room ..it was 10 o clock when i said him i am leaving but he asked me to stay night in his room thn i agreed .thn he asked me if he can sleep with me or somwhere else..i said u can sleep bcause he had only one blanket .thn he came to sleep in same bed .and hugged me while sleeping he moved my hands to his lower privite part so that i touch him but i dint respond for sometime ..thn again he was placing my hand indirectly there thn i touched him for 2 mint that he cum…this happend two times and we slept .in morning we were the same stranger to each other not talking to each othr or being too serious as nothing happend at night ..
I AM TOO confused whats happening actually …when i want to go no contact he will call and keep reminding me about him ..and sometime ignores me when i go to him for some work.dont even talk to me .
what should i take all these things?
one thing i want to add here .my ex new gf is europian..may be he wants to marry him for europian citizenship …i cant say anything but i used to listen him and he once gave me same advice to marry..

after 3 days i am having papers so i am taking some help in MATH from my ex now days .yesterday one of my friend said me that he was showing his gf pics to him etc…it hurted i dont know why but it hurted me …i am being crazy may be….
which way should i go now ..should i cut all contacts with him or do what?
what does he want actually?or just want to play with my feelings …
is there any advice for me ?
but after 2 months i have recoverd alot ..i was very weak before but i am now better and dont think about him all day now ….

thank you