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cant make a decision

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  • #107649
    Sarah
    Participant

    I’m going through a rather distressing time right now. For many reasons that are personal and not really something I’m eager to share… One of my big problems is that I really want something that I know might be controversial on this site : a nose job (rhinoplasty). I’ve never liked it and it’s caused me a lot of self esteem and anxiety issues. Even when I was getting a ton of compliments and attention and was happy, I still wanted it, even when I felt confident. The problem is though I now have more than half raised in money to get it, I’m still not sure whether I should approach my parents again about getting it (my mom said it wasn’t a no last time but at the time it couldn’t happen and she wasn’t comfortable). I don’t think I could take it if now even though I have more than some money I still won’t be able to get it and it would make things in the house all awkward again which I really don’t want. I’ll be old enough to consent for it on my own in 8 months, but it would be so much more convenient to do it this summer. I’m just scared about asking again. I know I want it, I just don’t know whether I should ask now and wait and do it all by myself (with a little support obviously) later. I’m just really trying to feel more confident in my own skin and it’s really hard when your biggest insecurity is right in the middle of your face. I am grateful for all that I have don’t get me wrong, I could just really use some advice if anyone was willing to offer it.

    #107651
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear thingstodo777:

    Then ask your mother again. Express your request in a way most likely to get a Yes from her. No reason to wait. If your request is denied, then you can wait another eight months. If your request is accepted, then you get what you want sooner.

    I don’t see a physical threat in having a nose job, quite a routine procedure and has been routine for a long, long time. Get a competent professional to do it, someone with excellent reputation. Check his work before time.

    And this is then how I would approach your mother about it being done while you are still a minor: tell her you are absolutely sure you want it and you are determined to have it done as soon as you can. Tell her you are hoping you can do it this summer, still as a minor, because you need her help. You need her to help you choose a competent professional to do the job. You need her experience and caring for you so to help you evaluate a doctor for competency, reliability, dependability. You need her to get involved in the process. You need your mother with you, I would tell her if I was you, in this very meaningful endeavor. Make it all a mother/ daughter bonding time, her involvement and partnership in this thing that is so very meaningful to you. (All this if it is true to you).

    anita

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