I hope I organized this in the right forum post. Thanks !

Hello, I feel need for simple wisdom for complex lives. I am feeling the angst, guilt, sadness, and confusion of what appears to be a breakup. Generally, I came here looking for advice about communication techniques. My view of a problem which I have declared as a conditional boundary of a relationship is communication feedback. By the way, just declaring this boundary in public makes me wonder if I am overly argumentative, and I am ignoring deeper issues. ( did not think I was prior).
I read learned something about communication models once or twice to include feedback. If I ask a question then I should wait for some acknowledgement that they heard at least the question. I have found that repeating the question comes off as aggressive , and also following it with ‘does that make sense ? ‘ sounds aggressive ‘. I will be honest in that after a few ignored questions, my body language likely does change out of frustration. Anyway, I have given up. I am looking for a way to talk honestly and caring about our problems, and create solutions to communicate with the woman I love. I have a week to do it while she is still in the USA and before she flies back to Europe. We are engaged, after an 8 year long distance relationship.
I would be happy to go into more details, but as I mentioned I am feeling a bit confused and do not want to digress.
Thanks !