I just thought of something. It is possible he has XYX chromosomes. XX is femaile, XY male, but XXY is a male with more female body stuff going on. My friend in college had that, but appeared male. But downstairs, no lasting erection.

Anyway, back to my old BF. He was sweet, sweet, sweeter than sweet. He seemed to want it and like it, but I had to make the first move sometimes. Looking back, my first (and maybe only) big Red Flag Clue was: He said he had read the whole Black Stallion collection when he was a kid. And loved it. OK, that’s like, dozens and dozens of books! This is beyond today’s Bronies. Ya know? LOL

Hi Tracey,
I understand it’s a sensitive subject but I believe that when you are intimate and in a relationship with someone, it is best to share your feelings in a candid (but kind) way. Chances are, if he is behaving in such overtly (stereotypically) “female” ways, you aren’t the first person who has questioned his sexuality. It’s possible he simply has a lower sex drive than you. And there are heterosexual men out there who use a lot of products, invest time on grooming, etc. A guy I dated years ago was very “metrosexual” – he had more beauty products in the medicine cabinet than I did, and he loved to buy clothes (both for himself and me), etc. But he was straight and today is married (to a woman) with a young son.

Coming from a single woman, this may sound a bit flippant, but you’re only 3 months in and to be honest, you don’t sound like you really like him all that much. Yes, you point out his good qualities, but for every good quality, there are 3 more that don’t suit you. Add to that the sexual incompatibility (and let’s face it, sex typically becomes less frequent as the “honeymoon” period wears off) and it’s hard to see much reason why you wouldn’t cut bait and wait for a man who really gets your motor runnin. Just my two cents. If you’re interested in working it out with him, communication will be key, imo.

Good luck!

I too have the same fear of my partners sexuality. Ive been with my guy almost 6 years now. We had a huge relationship defining moment about a year ago when i found pictures of him wearing my underwear and i found a porn site on his computer…gay porn. We split up for 9 months. It was the worst time of my life. The entire process was heart breaking not only for myself but also for my 7 year old which he has raised as his own. I was determined to let him go because frankly…how could i live with those images in my head anymore right? Well after the split, and after him begging and us talking and fighting (which isnt a bad thing) about what happened. We got back together. There isnt a day that goes by that i dont think about what happened at least once a day. Did i question his sexuality? MOST DEFINITELY. Do i still question it? I dont know anymore. He’s had a drug problem/alcohol problem…been to rehab, AA, all that. Things seem calm in that aspect now, but can i blame what he was doing on those things??? I dont know. My therapist said that he could have been doing those things to be closer to me. Could have…but not for certain.