Now that I’ve had a chance to step back and evaluate where my life is at, I’ve started making a lot of changes in my life. I’ve been working on cutting out old habits that don’t help my thinking, saying ‘no’ to people and situations that bring frustration or negativity into my life, and releasing any grudges I may have still had.

I’ve also learned an important lesson, that I can become a ‘self help’ addict who strives to constantly try and perfect myself rather than taking a moment to appreciate everything I am, even with what I want to change. The two things I acknowledge most recently are that for one: I can get frustrated quickly. And two: while I can handle big situations with ease, it’s an add-up of the little things that get to me somehow.

I’ve put myself on a sort of spiritual journey to gradually work on my connection with the Universe and with my personal spirit guides. I believe they’re there but have trouble feeling like I ‘know’ them or have them around. I get nervous about this pretty easily because for some reason I become self-conscious and want to do everything the ‘right’ way, and somehow I even start to worry my own guides will shake their heads at me!

Over the last few weeks though, this has gotten a lot better, and I’m starting to see more and more signs that they’re watching out for me as days go by. They like to give me signs through animals I don’t commonly see and messages through songs, since I love music so much, it’s an easy way to reach me. The other day though, I got an email for a spirit guide meditation and thought okay, why not? It seemed so random yet relevant to what I’ve been trying to do. It basically was just a means of asking to connect with their energy and receive some word that would mean something to me. I saw bright yellow light, like sunlight, and the word ‘light’ just kept coming to mind.

This is important: I didn’t even remember this until just now, because yesterday I was at an outdoor pool party. I got to relax on a floating chair for a while and just enjoy the sunlight and a nice breeze, and my mood has been really, really good. I feel inspired and upbeat and motivated to try to live the healthiest, happiest way I can in this moment without dwelling on the past or the future, and I can’t help but think that message was a guide trying to give me a hint as to how to improve my life- for two weeks I’d been reaching out to them asking for help in whatever ways they wanted to give it to me. I think getting out into the sunlight more often could work wonders for my emotional state, and with how much I tend to get stressed out- suddenly it’s like my stress has vanished about the small stuff I need to do this week. It’s almost funny because already I knew that sunlight was said to be good for both emotional and physical health, yet I hadn’t considered this as a simple means of reducing my anxiety or improving my life. Not that I never get outside, I just don’t tend to sit in the sun for a decent time too often. Guess sometimes the obvious things can still evade us!

Here’s hoping my connections with them can grow, and I’ll have the ultimate support team to watch my back as I go my own way in life.