It’ll be two years in November that my divorce was finalized.

Since April, I have put myself back out onto the dating scene. Lots in my life had changed since my divorce, including losing weight, getting healthy, new job, etc. I felt good, and so I decided to put myself out there.

I’ve been out with several women. For the most part, there was either no connection or some sort of barrier to anything continuing.

I recently started dating someone that I really clicked with. We’ve been out on two dates, and on both of those dates, I wound up sleeping over at her place. We haven’t had sex; she just invited me over the first time since it was getting late, and I took her up on it. We cuddled, made out, and just had a really nice, flowing connection. It felt really natural and normal.

We talk on Facebook messenger, and communications started fairly heavy and intense and then slowed down. As I notice that she isn’t responding back within an hour or two, or since last night in this case, I’ve started freaking out. My anxiety goes way up, and I’m terrified that she’s going to leave me.

Mind you, we’re not actually together. It’s only been two dates. However, the incredible hurt, sadness, and anxiety that came when my wife left me have come roaring back. I cried out in my head “please don’t leave me!” when I didn’t hear from her for a few hours the first time. We then saw each other a couple of days later, and all was great.

Haven’t heard from her since yesterday when I answered a question she asked and then said “how was your day?” No response.

My rational mind knows that she’s a busy person going through a stressful situation at the moment, so she probably just forgot or is otherwise occupied. Or maybe something totally different. It doesn’t matter in the grand scheme of things.

My rational mind knows this, but the pain of my divorce has come roaring back. She is the first person that I’ve felt a real connection with since my ex-wife. I love that I’ve found an awesome person like her, but these reactions coming from me have left me exhausted. I don’t want to do anything stupid and blow anything with her. I’d like for this to have a chance.

I’m going to hit her up on Facebook messenger tomorrow just to ask how her job interview went, and then we’ll take it from there.

Have you had this kind of thing happen to you before? When the pain of divorce or a breakup comes roaring back in a situation like this? If so, how did you handle it?