I can’t tell anymore if relationship worries causing depression anxiety or other way around. broke up with bf weeks ago because it wasn’t what I wanted – step kids, lack of time together and sex life not ideal.
We since have spoken in depth about the issues and come to some resolutions. But I still get major anxiety about going back into it. I feel an intense need to run away. It’s got so bad that I feel anxiety just about meeting up now. The anxiety has in turn led to depression. I started feeling the anxiety and depression months before breaking it off. I assumed it was because the situation wasn’t right for me. But since talking stuff out I don’t understand why I still feel it so intensely. Whenever he talks of the future I feel fear and hesitation. It’s not that I want to be with anyone else.
now my depression and anxiety is so bad I feel nothing, no desire, no love, no joy for anything. i can’t understand why.
he’s being incredibly supportive and I’m just numb, cold and want to run away a lot.
I am guessing that your anxiety and depression existed before your later in life relationship, simply because many of us suffer anxiety and depression early in life, in our very first or second decade of life. Problem is that at this point, this relationship is elevating your anxiety and depression, therefore, it makes sense that you end the relationship.
If you attend psychotherapy and/ or feel way better at some time in the future, maybe then you can think about contacting him. But for now, you are experiencing severe distress in the context of this relationship- better then to not be in that relationship.
If you want to share more about this relationship, about your life otherwise, past and present, anything at all that you think may be relevant, please do, and I will read and reply to you further.