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Ex spouse won’t communicate with me

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  • #383509
    Emma
    Participant

    I left my ex after 32 years of marriage. I have a hard time setting boundaries and caved on a lot of issues. I also thought if I didn’t ask for support and gave him what he asked for, we could have a “good” divorce and get along with one another.  Part of me wanted to be seen as nice and part of me wanted to spare the kids the drama, but I think that was naive.  I assumed we would communicate in a friendly, adult manner and didn’t need to draw up a legal agreement for every minor detail, but as soon as the papers were signed, he moved in with his new girlfriend and stopped communication with me.  I only email him when needed about family issues and try to be courteous and respectful, but he won’t respond to texts or emails and will only relay the occasional message through our son.  In the last year, I’ve texted a couple times asking politely for copies of the family photos but he’s not even responding.  From all accounts, I hear he is very happy now so I’m not sure why he is acting this way.  How can I communicate with someone who will not respond?  I am heartbroken to think I won’t get to see those photos of my kids again.

    #383540
    anita
    Participant

    Dear Emma:

    I am sorry that you are experiencing this heartbreak. I wish your ex acted differently!

    You wrote, “I hear he is very happy now, so not sure why he is acting this way“- can it be that his live-in girlfriend is very jealous, and does not allow him to communicate with you, that the deal in their relationship is that he will be “very happy” for as long as he does not communicate with you, or accommodate you in any way?

    anita

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