Sorry this is so long I needed to get it all out!!!!!
This is a hard situation and I’m not sure what to do. In August 2016 I got a phone call that my in-laws were kicked out of their home by the fire Marshall making it unlivable. I was asked if they could come to our house, I first asked if anyone had talked to their daughter as she has a 3story 4 bedroom home, we own a 3bd mobile home w/ 2 children, anyway she would not allow them to stay with her, so then I said “of course they can stay the night here.” Well the night ended up being 2 months.
I have a 11, & 13 year old and my mother in law is an alcoholic, (we took in both in laws, and brother in law) so 7 people in a 1000 square foot home.
I did not realize how bad of an alcoholic she was. After a couple of days she got super drunk got in my sons face (while hubby was here) proceeded to tell him how hes not right and there is something wrong with him. I got upset and took my kids and moved out for a few days. I then decided why should my kids have to leave their home and went back. BIG MISTAKE.
She was asked by my husband me and her husband not to drink at our home yet she continued to do so, even started drinking in her car then coming inside drunk. More than a few times she would call me a sl*t, cu*t, and bi*ch, (pretty much every time she drank) this would happen in front of my children.
This would happen on school nights and she was disturbing my kids emotionally, we would stay gone until about 8pm every night doing homework in the car etc. I would even shower at my gym so I wouldn’t have to be at home. We would eat out every night and on weekends my kids would go stay with friends. My husband works night so he was never here when she acted like this and it did not have the same effect on him. We were so physically and emotionally exhausted.
The last night they were here she was sitting in her car for over an hour after I came home. I was folding laundry in my room, I tried to walk through my living room to take laundry to kids rooms, wo even saying a word to her, she started yelling sl*t, cu*t, bi*ch. I then proceeded to tell her she needed to leave that we were not dealing with that again. She then followed me into MY bedroom I told her if she didn’t leave I would call the police. She would not stop so I called the cops, whom told me to go lock myself into the bedroom with my kids. As I was walking to their room she followed me started yelling at me and them and then started shoving me. My bro in law was gone and father in law stuck in a wheel chair (couldn’t leave the living room-which became his bathroom and bedroom). I had no protection. I told my kids to lock the door and tell the police she was hitting me. My son called his dad, who was at work, who told them to stop me. REALLY, she was hitting me. My husband then called me somehow I got to my phone and he told me not to call the cops on her. WHY!!! She was hitting me and scaring his kids. He then told me the kids jumped out the window and ran across the street.
I then pushed her off me and ran out the front door. The cop was outside when I got out there and I explained the situation to him. He went inside to talk to her, telling her to leave, she got irate with the cop as well. Telling his she would sue him. I told the officer I would not press charges for abuse, but I should have looking back.
They are out of our home now. but she continues to harass me, send me and my husband rude messages about me, lies about things, gets information from her daughter who is also against me due to me not allowing her to control me anymore.
All of this being said, I dont want my kids around my mother in law, my husband gets so angry. He refused to tell his mom she is wrong, and yells and cusses at me when I bring things up. Both of my kids are in counseling due to the grandma and fighting in the home.
I know my kids should come first, I feel this is such a toxic relationship and situation for my kids.
What do I do? My husband refuses to go to counseling to work on anything, I told him hes letting his mom win by trying to make us hate each other.
any advice will be helpful