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I don’t know what’s wrong with my relationship

HomeForumsRelationshipsI don’t know what’s wrong with my relationship

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  • #220337
    Illias
    Participant

    Hello. My name is Illias. Me and my girlfriend have been in a relationship for almost 2 months now. My girlfriend has broken up with me before because she wanted space and I didn’t offer her that. Instead of giving her space, I wanted to be there for her and wanted to know what was wrong. Instead, I believe she overreacted and she had broken up with me. A week after we broke up, we had gotten back together and we discussed what happened and she told me that she did in fact overreact and she told me that “whenever I ask for space, please just give it to me.” Now I granted her that, &’ she also told me that I cannot be as clingy as I am. A few weeks into the relationship and lately I have just been getting mad at her for no reason. At night, I cry and feel bad for myself because I just feel like I hurt her and or make her feel bad about herself. Last night, we had went shopping with two other friends. While we were there, I automatically just got mad at everyone, &’ didn’t want to hug or just be around my girlfriend. While I’ve been mad, everyone kept saying these hateful remarks like about how poor my family is, &’ or making me feel sensitive and insecure about myself. We all went to a store and my friend said something that made me insecure, &’ without thinking, I slapped her on the arm, &’ everyone started looking at me. My girlfriend started screaming at me and started saying “if you ever do that to me, I will break up with you.” I feel like I’ve broken her heart and made me think of me like I’m the worst boyfriend in the world. Can someone please tell me why I continuosly get mad at my girlfriend and why I flashed out in a angry way?

    #220345
    Prash
    Participant

    Dear Ilias,

    Look in to the situations that happened when you are getting “mad”. Think about what thoughts go through in your mind when that happens. There will be reasons for that; being aware of your feelings, the thoughts behind those feelings can help you find out.

    You mentioned about “hateful remarks about your family”, so looking at your relationship with your family and the basis of your insecurity (“making me feel sensitive and insecure about myself”.”my friend said something that made me insecure”)will help you find the answers to the questions that you seek.

    Take care

    #220373
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear lllias:

    You asked, “Can someone please tell me why I continuously get mad at my girlfriend and why I flashed out in an angry way?”

    I detected one thing that is a reason for a person to get angry “everyone kept saying these hateful remarks like how poor my family is”- I assume you felt angry when they said what they said, didn’t you?

    And then maybe you didn’t tell those “friends” that you were angry, didn’t express your anger at them but instead expressed it by slapping your girlfriend’s arm. Is that what happened?

    anita

     

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