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I'm unable to find a job that will support me and I don't know what to do

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Viewing 7 posts - 1 through 7 (of 7 total)
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  • #197307
    Joseph
    Participant

    I’ve been trying to find full time work for months now and haven’t been able to find anything. I’ve been working at Target for a few months but I can’t survive off of part-time work anymore. Especially since lately I’ve been getting maybe 12 hours a week max. I recently just dropped out of college because all the stress was getting to me and I couldn’t handle it. I also had no clue why I was even going to school anymore and didn’t know what I wanted to get a degree in. Besides the work I’ve done at Target I have no work experience what so ever. I’ve been putting in applications and sending resumes out but I never get any emails or calls back. I’ve had my resume checked and revised but still nothing. I can’t afford to go back to school even if I wanted to. I recently also lost my health insurance and have been having to pay back medical bills. I have also been having to dump a bunch of money into my car because it barely runs and I don’t know when it’s going to just give out on me. I’m currently living with my parents so I don’t have to pay rent. That isn’t going vert well though because my relationship with my father is very toxic. I don’t know how much longer I can handle living with him. I’ve tried staffing agencies to at least get my foot in the door somewhere but usually they just never get back to me. At this point I don’t know what to do. I need to get a job that will help me slowly take the steps to becoming independent and being able to support myself. It just feels like it’s never going to happen though. I’ll just be stuck working at Target, for as long as they keep me around, and living with my parents for the foreseeable future. This and everything else going on has been making me extremely depressed and it doesn’t feel like there’s much point in doing anything anymore.

    #197347
    anita
    Participant

    Dear Joseph:

    I would like to understand your situation better, therefore I ask: can you share more about what you referred to as a “very toxic” relationship with your father, how long it has been going on and what is going on day in and day out interacting with him. Also, what about your mother, how does she act toward you and how does she respond to your father doing what he is doing?

    anita

    #197349
    VJ
    Participant

    Hi Joesph,

    This does happen sometimes. There is no response from anyone and we start doubting ourselves, our resume, etc. It just seems that you will be forever stuck in the same place, but take it guaranteed that is not how it happens eventually.

    If you haven’t been receiving any response in other jobs at least as of now, why don’t you consider asking Target to give you a full time opportunity? I understand you may not want to do it for your entire life but you can at least begin wherever you are right now. Perhaps some other branch of Target if not this one? Or maybe use this experience in some other giant super market? You could do this while you keep applying for other jobs and if you happen to end up getting both then you can choose among them as per your interests.

    #197531
    Joseph
    Participant

    Thank you for the responses. I describe my relationship with my dad as “toxic” because of a few reasons. The main thing is lately we seem to not be able to talk to each other at all without getting into some sort of argument or him just complaining about something I can’t do right. He also just keeps trying to force his view of what I should be on me. It’s just gotten to a point where we can’t be happy in the same house anymore. My mom tries to be supportive but there isn’t much that can be done about my dad. She can’t really help with that. As for a full-time position at Target that more than likely not going to happen. Most positions they offer don’t offer the ability to be full-time. The only full-time positions they have would require me to get a promotion which I don’t think is going to happen. Most super market jobs I have seen seem to only provide full-time to upper level positions like team/shift leads, supervisors, managers, and stuff like that. I have talked to my managers about possibly trying to get more hours but they have all told me it just isn’t possible.

    #197565
    Louise
    Participant

    Dear Joseph,

    I would start a different place than trying to tackle the problems you mention head-on, because in my experience solutions and happiness often surface at the periphery of your field of vision.

    I recommend that you write a narrative of all the things that are OK (and above) in your life. Perhaps you have cool friends, a rocking girlfriend, OK health, – continue in your own words. You are at a crossroads in your life and you need a foundation to leap from. Think of it as trying to jump in sand versus on a trampoline. Now, you should pin this narrative some place visible to you – so that before you speak to potential employers or write an application, you know that you are an amazing and unique person with a lot to offer. YOU ARE!

    God speed!

    Louise.

    #197621
    anita
    Participant

    Dear Joseph;

    Because of the very unhealthy for you situation at home, with your father, maybe it is best that you move out ASAP. It may be impossible for you to improve your life when your brain keeps getting this toxicity, or poison, at home. Similar to being chemically poisoned, how can you figure how to improve your life when you are almost always nauseous, from the poison?

    How about a job that includes living in someone’s else’s home, a care taker, let’s say?

    anita

    #197579
    Ashley
    Participant

    Hi Joseph,

    I am very sorry to hear that you’ve been having a tough time. First and foremost congratulations on not giving up. Life can definitely get difficult sometimes but it seems like you’re just sticking to it and not letting it get the best of you.

    As for the job situation, have you tried applying to McDonald’s or other fast food restaurants? I know it may not be the ideal job but it it only temporary and being someone who has been a manager at multiple restaurants I can tell you that when employers see that you have worked in a restaurant it lets them know that you have patience, good people skills and they are more likely to hire you because they know you have lots of customer service under your belt. While you’re looking for second job you can also offer to help out neighbours with odd jobs such as possibly decluttering or cleaning their house, cutting their grass, walking their dog(s) etc. If you’re willing to work hard you can come up with the money you need. Anything is better than what your situation is now right? You can be a little more picky later when you have more financial freedom but for now you can’t be picky if you want full time hours and more money.

     

    Now onto your car, you can’t afford it. Plain and simple. As you said you can’t keep dumping money into it especially since you have no extra money to spend on it. I would advise to park the car and start taking public transit. It may not be what you are used to but it will definitely help you save money for moving out or for an emergency fund. Plus paying for a monthly bus pass is a lot cheaper than insurance, gas and maintenance. If you want to get ahead and have more cash available you need to make some sacrifices. It doesn’t mean you won’t ever be able to drive a car, it just means right now the smart thing to do financially is to either park the car or sell it.

     

    I am sorry to hear that your relationship with your father is toxic. Remember that you living with him is only temporary and if anything it will motivate you more to find another job and save money so you can one day move out.

     

    Hang in there Joseph.

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