Home→Forums→Relationships→Is it worth it?
- This topic has 11 replies, 2 voices, and was last updated 7 years, 10 months ago by Anonymous.
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January 22, 2017 at 2:22 pm #125909NaomiParticipant
Hi, I’m really not sure what to do. It has been about month since I broke up with my boyfriend and I still have feelings for him. A couple weeks ago I messaged him a simple hello to see if he would respond. If he had responded sooner, I would’ve poured out my feelings. Luckily, he didn’t cause he replied finally today since he stopped checking that app. I couldn’t text him since I deleted his number and he unfriended me on facebook. When I got his message, I honestly felt nervous and excited. He asked me why I contacted him and told me he stopped using that app since we broke up. I told him it’s cause I ‘missed’ him and I wanted to ask him a few questions but couldn’t remember them. Eventually, I made a few questions on the spot and asked if he hates me. He said, “I guess not”. I also asked why he unfriended me on fb and he told me it’s cause I’m out of his life and far away and he wasn’t going to talk to me. So he doesn’t see the point. After that, I asked how he’s been and he told me to just text him and he gave me his number. But that made me confused cause I thought he wanted to cut all ties. But he said checking that app causes him to lose data and that its a hassle. Now I have the opportunity to text him but I’m not sure if its worth it.
January 22, 2017 at 5:38 pm #125919AnonymousGuestDear cutepotatoe97n:
I don’t think it is worth it for you because it doesn’t read to me like he is interested. If he sends you a friend request in Facebook, to undo the befriending, that will be an initiative on his part that will show some interest in you. But he didn’t, did he?
anita
January 22, 2017 at 5:45 pm #125920NaomiParticipantHi Anita,
This all happened in just a couple of hours so I don’t expect him to re-friend me today. But yeah I was getting the same vibe. I ended up texting him anyway telling him that I remember what I wanted to ask him from a while back. He’s curious, I told him that I don’t think it’s worth telling him anymore. So he told me to feel free to tell him anytime and that he usually texts back right away. I wasn’t expecting that reply. He sounded nice and I don’t know what to think once again.
January 22, 2017 at 6:01 pm #125923AnonymousGuestDear cutepotatoe97n:
I don’t know the history of your relationship with him, how he behaved when in relationship with you, how you did, and what went … right and wrong.
What caused the breakup and is it a good idea to get back together/ is it something that will be good for you?
anita
January 22, 2017 at 6:36 pm #125926NaomiParticipantDear Anita,
Sorry haha. The reason I broke up with him is I felt like he was losing interest in me and my best friend told me to dump him. She told me to cause he couldnt buy me a gift for christmas… This is where it gets tricky, I got him a gift and I thought he just wasn’t appreciating it cause I wanted to send it to him but every time I get to asking for his address he would kind of avoid it. When I finally confronted him about it, he told me its cause he feels bad for not having anything to give me so he doesnt want me to get him a gift. But idk my friend kept telling me other things, and that he doesnt have a job and stuff. But it was only a few months before december since he left his job. The other reason I decided to break up with him is cause I felt like he wasn’t ambitious enough and I like to have deep conversations with people. But that feels silly too cause I have had a few deep conversations with him when I pry him. Other than all that, we were very happy and I felt like our relationship was going great. We were together for about 5 months. He’s 21 and I’m 19
January 22, 2017 at 6:43 pm #125928AnonymousGuestDear cutepotatoe97:
Do you live with your parents while he lives with his parents? During the five months relationship did he visit you in your home (you didn’t have his address, so I guess you didn’t visit him in his home)? Was it a long distance/ online relationship….?
anita
January 22, 2017 at 6:45 pm #125929NaomiParticipantAnita
I live on campus and I’m a full time student. We never got to visit each other because of money on both of our parts. And it was long distance, we skyped almost everyday even if it was just to say good night, we tried to see each other often.
January 22, 2017 at 6:51 pm #125931AnonymousGuestDear cutepotatoe97n:
It is long distance then. And he was losing interest in you before, and that is why you broke up with him. His present behavior doesn’t show much interest. Living on campus, maybe there is a young man that you can see in-person, one who may be very interested in you once he gets to know you first, as a friend…?
Why pursue the long distance not-so-interested guy, maybe not interested at all, when you could meet an interested guy in person?
anita
January 22, 2017 at 7:00 pm #125933NaomiParticipantDear Anita,
I know that I could meet someone here but I honestly don’t care whether its here or in another state cause I rarely get my feelings reciprocated anyway. I’m not going to try to pursue him because I know it’s a risky situation. I guess I want to know whether it’s worth asking how he felt after breaking up or his perspective on things. Obviously, that could go south and my heart may be broken but maybe it would be easier to completely move on. I’ve been trying to move on but it’s so difficult sometimes. I’ve been going out with friends and meeting new ones, I even went out of my way to text a guy that I used to talk to last year. But I just can’t help my feelings right now. :/
January 22, 2017 at 7:10 pm #125934AnonymousGuestDear cutepotatoe97n:
If he will answer you honestly, it will be a good idea to find out more about how he felt after the breakup and his perspective of things, good idea. It will give you information that you need. I only hope he will answer you honestly and thoroughly.
If you ask him, write here if and what he answers, will you?
anita
January 22, 2017 at 7:18 pm #125935NaomiParticipantDear anita,
Thank you, I will be sure to write here! He sounded really nice in his text to my surprise cause he said message him if I ever feel the need to and that he usually answers right away. I have a small bit of hope since he seems to want to hear me out.
January 22, 2017 at 7:26 pm #125937AnonymousGuestDear cutepotatoe97n:
Well, he invited you to message him, so do so and post his answer here. I can … feel your hope and I do wish it goes well for you.
(Back at the computer in about 12 hours, good night)
anita
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