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Mementos of an ex

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  • January 5, 2020 at 3:56 am #331169
    Lealea
    Participant

    I was tidying up in my bedroom and found a box in my partner’s bedside draw that had a picture and letter from his ex. I’d seen this box before but never looked in it and it wasn’t in his bedside table.

    I understand people keep mementos of their ex but this box had been moved there…maybe to keep it close? It also has the wedding ring we bought for when we marry. Am I being completely paranoid about this?

    January 5, 2020 at 5:52 am #331175
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Lealea:

    Here is a possible scenario: he bought you a wedding ring, showed it to you, and because you are not married yet, he has to keep it somewhere. So he looked around.. where is a safe place to put it? He sees a box, and he thinks: this is it, this is where I’ll put it! So he does. He didn’t even notice what is already in the box (a letter and a picture), didn’t care to look. He put the ring in there. Later, he is thinking: I don’t want to forget where I put the ring! So he takes the box and put it in his bedside table, this is how he will never forget where the ring is, safe and secure until wedding day.

    I think that this scenario is way more likely than any other scenario. What do you think?

    anita

    January 5, 2020 at 8:07 am #331191
    Inky
    Participant

    Hi Lealea,

    Guys don’t think too deeply about these things. For women though, everything is fraught with meaning.

    As long as he doesn’t forget where he put the ring, that’s all that matters. If you move the picture and letter to another location it would be admittedly interesting to see if he ever notices or what his reaction would be.

    There is a box of moldy pictures and letters from my husband’s ex’s in our basement. Mine are covered in bat dung in the attic. That’s how we solved that one.

    Best,

    Inky

    • This reply was modified 4 years, 10 months ago by Inky.
    January 6, 2020 at 1:40 am #331301
    Lealea
    Participant

    Thanks guys! Anita that is a likely scenario, I’m sure I’ve read too much into it! Funny inky I was thinking about moving it …but I feel I should let it go. It’s not about him really it’s about my insecurities. Thanks so much to you both!

    January 6, 2020 at 6:03 am #331319
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Lealea:

    You are welcome. It just occurred to me that if his focus regarding that box was the other woman, if he had romantic feelings for her, that box would have contained mementos from her alone (just the letter and the photo); it  wouldn’t have included a ring he bought for another woman (you)! I think he just didn’t notice.

    Post again anytime.

    anita

     

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