The space between waking up and getting out of bed seems to be the most difficult of the day. I’m noticing how often I wake up with negative memories and feelings of guilt, shame, inadequacy, trepidation, angst, and almost a child-like regression.

As I linger there for a few minutes in that state of semi-consciousness, getting ready to get up, I’m acutely aware of these unpleasant thoughts and feelings.

But then the moment I get up and by the time I take the few steps to the shower, those feelings have disappeared. In the shower, I feel more alive, jubilant, anticipating the day, excited to be alive, looking forward to what the world might have to offer. It’s as if the rational part of my brain switches on and I recognize that there’s no reason to be thinking or feeling that way.

So my question is, what’s happening in that semi-conscious state? Where are all of these negative feelings coming from? Why don’t they persist when I’m fully awake?

Has anyone else experienced this? Is there a way not to experience this unpleasant kind of waking up?