I have this close friend, Molly. Summertime and she told me that things are not going well with Jay and her. They werent officially together but they both had feelings for each other. She told me that she didnt want Jay anymore and she was also stuck in a situation where she had to choose between love or friendship (Jay or her bestfriend) and yes she chose her best friend.
When classes started, I could still see Molly and Jay having good times together. And by this time, I still have feelings with John (we werent together, just feelings and I guess were in the MU stage- I also ended the thing we have and decided to remain friends last summer). And so Molly continually shared with me how she didnt want to go back to Jay anymore and how their communication started to fade.
Then a day came where we had our final seat plan in class but a week after I was transferred right next to Jay. Just so you know, Me and John and Jay are classmates while Molly is at the other section.

Days came and I realized that Jay is such a fun seatmate and I was really enjoying time with him. Of course I told Molly about this and it seemed nothing to her and she just kept on agreeing to my stories.
Election day came when I gave John a closure letter but I didnt really tell him that it was a closure letter. He just knew that it was a letter. And so all my feelings for John were already gone but I know he still has strong feelings for me but he understood that I can only offer him my friendship.

Days passed and little did I know that I was already starting to like Jay. I thought I just got overwhelmed because we’re seatmates but I realized that I was growing genuine feelings for him. This scared me because Im afraid of how Molly would react. When I spend time with Molly, I ask her questions like: are you really over Jay? And she said yes and she was so full of sincerity so I believed she was so done with Jay. But I didnt tell her that I have feelings for Jay.

Days passed and Jay and I are really close with each other already. I dont know what has gotten in to me but I was the first one to tell him that I like him. I was surprised that he told me that he feels the same. He wanted to proceed to courtship but I told him to fix things with Molly first. And yes their communication went back and I guess they were awkward friends.

Then one day Molly just stopped talking to me. I let it pass for a few days but I confronted her about the issue. I asked her if she was fine with my closeness with Jay or would she want me out of their life cause maybe they could evaluate their feelings. She said I dont have to because she was already doing fine and she doesnt want to stop me and Jay from being happy. Then me and Molly started talking again. She was so cool with what happened because she even told me that it would be so immature that we’d fight over Jay. She already knew there was something about me and jay and she seemed okay with it and she told me to watch out because she has been there done that. It was so nice that things were actually falling to the right places and I had this hope in me that maybe Jay and I could happen because we were fine with our Exes (Molly and John) but then
A week after, I was so shocked because she started to call me a bitch. I knew about this because my bestfriend Gemma is her close friend. So when Molly tells Gemma things about me, I would know. I didnt mind her and I didnt compete with her anger. I was just passive about it. I couldnt even live with this kind of conflict so I confronted her again through viber. Last time I confronted her, she told me that she was starting to grow feelings for Jay again. But this time, she told me to leave her alone because she was already happy. I told her that I’ve forgiven her and Ive forgiven myself and I hope in time we could be friends again. She just seen-zoned me.
Days passed and I already accepted the fact that we wouldnt be friends anymore. So I focused on my relationship with Jay. We didnt decide to be officially together because things were so complicated and people would say that I should respect molly and her past. Jay and I didnt have a label, I guess we were stranded in the “just friends” phase but I know for a fact that we already love each other. Not like anymore because that would be such a shallow term. We’ve been through hell to make things work. I even asked him if he would want me to give him time and space to truly evaluate his feelings and he said no need because he was certain that he was serious about me.
Then we had a get together with my group of friends (Molly,Me,Jay,John,Gemma belong to the same group of friends) there were alcoholic drinks involved but only the boys took shots. Jay didnt join so John and the other boys enjoyed them drinks. John got drunk and I was there when he said his drunk thoughts. I realized how broken he was when I left and how mad he was at Jay because he didnt respect the bro code because right from the start Jay knew that John still has feelings for me.
Before this alcohol bonanza happened, John already told me that he approves my relationship with Jay thats why I was confused when I heard his drunk thoughts.
The get together was a mess because the boys drunk too much and started to puke which was so gross. After the get together, John stopped talking to me. I didnt try to reach out because I want him to completely move on. There came a time when I wanted to fix things so I then tried to reach out but it was hopeless so I stopped trying.
I continued checking on Molly through twitter thru gemma’s account because molly blocked me. There were times when she was so happy (which makes me happy as well) but there would be times that she would tweet about emotional stuff because up to this point, she still loves Jay. She would also tweet bad words about me and how bad I was but I understood that was her way of showing how hurt she was.

There would be times when I’d think about putting the thing that Jay and I have together to a complete stop just so to please our Exes and maybe that would solve the conflicts but we already love each other too much to let go.

At present, Molly and John are not speaking to me in any way possible. Molly and Jay are back to being friends. John and Jay’s friendship wasnt jeopardize.

I am madly in love with Jay and I know he feels the same but I also know for a fact that I love him more than he could ever imagine.

Present conflict:Gemma gets jealous because Im spending more time with Jay than with her. She feels like she doesnt have a place in my life anymore. I hate it when she feels alone 🙁 I dont want to reach the point where I have to choose between Gemma or Jay.

Guys send me your help. let me know about your thoughts.
I would gladly appreciate it xx thanks!