Home→Forums→Tough Times→No hope…
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October 19, 2013 at 9:05 pm #44020SarahParticipant
I have lost all my faith in everyone and every thing.
2 months after leaving my home and moving to another country I realize I had only one true friend, one one person who stays in contact with me. One. After all that time learning and growing with people that meant most to me they just disappear from my life like its nothing. I thought moving would be great, less than a week here and I had a job and a boyfriend ( we met before I moved), and a school to start planning for where I would learn the techniques that I need for the rest of my career.Until, my boyfriend and I broke up, my cat died, Im stuck in a position that doesnt require any skill of what I spent the last year of my life doing, and not being able to attend this new school until at least january.
Now I am alone, completely.
I hate the thought of making friends, I despise the thought of love actually existing, and I feel like I’m stuck.
The only thing I have any interest in is bringing myself into a healthy state (Ive always been struggling with weight issues, depression, and anxiety) by eating clean and trying to be more active. I may start yoga next week. But I just absolutely hate the thought of other people coming into my world. As a leo and a very social person all my life this scares me.
Is there ANYONE who can help me see a bright side? Because I am quickly losing all hope.
October 19, 2013 at 11:28 pm #44028HeeParticipantThe bright side is you’re not the only one who thinks that. I have been through a similar experience where I started becoming delusional and started to hate everyone and everything around me. This probably doesn’t make any sense to you, as I’m in my own little world. Things doesn’t look so positive or upbeat from where I currently stand. I’m currently jobless, no friends whatsoever, and every humanity that seems to want to take a step towards me, I push them away…. and I just don’t know why…. or they seem to limit themselves… it seems???? I just can’t seem to trust people like I used to or whether the life I’m living is real or not real. ……. This all to say that… life gets difficult sometimes and sometimes you’re just stuck. I don’t think there there’s any way around that. The advice is up to you. You can either lose all hope …. or….. somehow miraculously turn things around. Soooo at this point, good luck to you! Do you know when all this started to happen, after I started reading horoscopes… so stay away…..
October 20, 2013 at 6:53 am #44033SarahParticipantThank you for your reply, Hee.
It does make sense as I understand humans often eel the same things yet no one expresses them. Another reason Im so turned away.
I think this started happening after my boyfriend and I started having problems. He was always saying my lifestyle was low class and not good enough for him (keep in mind I graduated high school, college, got a job, and am continuing school when it starts again) But since I smoke and live with my parents (I just turned 20), he didnt think I was ‘grown up’ or was going anywhere in life.When we had a talk and I told him that when I first moved here I was raped he got very upset because I wasnt ‘clean’ to him anymore. Even though he had known Id been with two people he didnt realize it was recently. So…pretty much he just made me realize how sleazy and oblivious men can be (women can do it to) but thats basically what made me lose my interest in interacting and trusting other people.
I hope your situation starts to look up, Hee. I know it can be hard :/
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