Hi Kayla,

I’m really sorry to hear what you must be going through. Is there anyway you can join a supportive (face to face) network with other single Moms? Sometimes it helps, when people can support each other when faced with a particular situation such as divorce, grief, being a single Mom, etc. Also, is there any way you can consider going back on Antidepressants? Even just temporarily, and Anti-anxietu medications? Sometimes, that will give you the motivation you need to talk to people. The worst thing right now, is to go through this alone.

As far as that man, instead of texting which can be a bit impersonal and distant, is there anyway you can call him, and invite him out for a cup of coffee? Things seemed to be going so well, before you went on vacation, maybe he got sad that you didn’t call him while you were on vacation, and he took it as a sign of not caring. Some people can be like that. Or maybe he thought you took someone on vacation with you, maybe another man, etc. I would chalk it up to a lack of communication or a simple misunderstanding. Try to take it one day at a time. It will get better. Do nice things for yourself. Try to find something to look forward to, perhaps an online dating site, or if you like animals, volunteer at your local animal sanctuary, maybe join a book club, or go to a local dog park. I have met lots of men doing this. Take a nice bubble bath, listen to some soothing music, watch something funny on TV. Try to distract yourself. Each day will get a little better. x

Hi Kayla,

I really do understand..as I have been there. I too just got tired of everything, tired of reaching out, tired of being strong, tired of constant disappointment, tired of trying to stay motivated, when I just wanted to pull the covers over my head. Tired of calling friends. Tired of my 12 step programs and being a sponsor, just plain old tired of life.

That’s when I knew I had to do something. Therapy didn’t help, support groups didn’t help, dating didn’t help, nothing helped. I pretty much have up. I went on Antidepressants. Like you, I got sick to my stomach and has horrendous side effects. I was on Lexapro, Zoloft, Paxil, Prozac, Cymbalta. These meds made me feel like a zombie, numbed my emotions. They are in a class of medications called SSRI’S. (Selective Serotonin Reuptake inhibitors).  There are many different classes of medications out there. Then I went to my Psychiatrist, and said do something! They did a cheek swab (it’s new and being offered in Doctor’s offices now) they match you up (cheek swab) with the right antidepressant. I was put on Remeron. It’s an older antidepressant and not really in any “class” but it was a Godsend. I finally got my life back. I’m still on it, was put on it in 1995. Then I had another cheek swab and was also put on Wellbutrin which I believe is an SNRI class of antidepressants. 8m just saying don’t give up on something that may work very well for you. x

• This reply was modified 7 years, 2 months ago by Eliana.

Dear Kayla,

Nothing has happened to you other than that you have become mentally exhausted after life’s challenges thrown at you.

Most of the times there may be nothing extra that is needed…..Simply lying down and breathing is needed.

– try Conscious breathing

(http://tinybuddha.com/blog/conscious-breathing-simplest-way-work-emotional-pain-enjoy-life/)

When the blocked energy in the head (or body) is dissolved, you will start to regain control of your life back again. You will start talking to people again and start to make decisions on what is needed in any particular situation.

Regards,
~VJ