Please help because I think we’re in same situation or mine is really worst. I’m 18 yrs old male
Year ago, I have many problems. I have personal issues w/ my mother , my classmate and w/ my self bcus I was in a state of Identity crisis that time. I like her (my GF) and I love her and I tried everything for our relationship to be just OK. But my problems really interferes our relationship. We promise together that no matter what happened. We will fight for it. But she gave up. 🙁 I hate her for giving up on me. But I love her more than life itself! She never gave me a chance to make things right. She said she can’t take it anymore. She doesn’t love me and if I love her, I let her go. She blocked me on Facebook. She changed number and went somewhere far. I heard she’s OK now, happy and found new love. and it really broke my Heart. I love her so much and I need her! I tried to Let go, to move on and forget her but I can’t cus I need her. We promised that we Love each other forever.. what should I do??

So I read your Convo w/ Lunarforest and it helps me so much . I realized that I’ve never talked to anyone about this matter because I have no other bestfriends to talk to except her, and because I thought I can handle this alone. wow ! Thank God I found this site and your Discussion about this matter. It helped me so much and I learned a lot by just reading your discussion w/ Lunarforest. Thank you for making me realized that I am not alone. I’ve been too stupid about this but you made my Brain function. thank you so much !

Hi Albana,
Thanks for your advices. I also take you as my friend. I believe with the time goes by, both of us will feel better and better. I would be happy if we can gradually forget our past and embrace our new life in the future. You can also reach me on lunarforest@163.com. We can share some happy time in our life rather than drown in the breakup.:)

I really feel better now . to be Fair for us. Someday , she’ll realize what she’d lost or I realize that I don’t need her.

Hi Annie,
I feel so sorry about your story. I think you’re a romantic and courageous girl. You must be deeply hurt, heartbroken and despaired now. You don’t know the reason for breakup. You can’t give up a relationship that took you 3 years to invest and keep. I Will share my story to you. My ex lives in another city 3 hrs away. She broke up with me just before Vday. So I made the full preparation to meet her in her place. But I didn’t tell her I would come. The valentine’s night, which was the worst in my life, I kept waiting for her at her place for the whole night and she didn’t show up. The next day she told me she was out of town…I didn’t get a chance to see her or even have a call with her.

I really appreciate your courage to fly to Japan to visit your bf. However, the fact is that he won’t be moved by your action. If he decided to break up, there must be some reason. Since you’ve been together for 3 years, the reason must come from many issues in your life rather than just one simple thing. Another fact is that you can not change his mind by doing something. Only he can decide his mind. If he feels regret in the future, he will contact you and come back. Otherwise, it’s just you are hurting yourself.

Birthdays or anniversaries are so terrible after breakup. You will always think that it is supposed to be a splendid day. But now the day becomes painful. I know the feeling. I’m also afraid of my ex’s birthday in just less than 2 weeks. Last year it was so good and so memorable. But this year, it can’t be worse. Since you still have 2 months time, I would suggest you just move on. After 2 months, you won’t have the pain today. Time heals all wounds. But if you still decide to visit him, there’s a big chance that your wound will open again. If you love him, set him free. If he loves you back, he will back. Otherwise, just move on.

BTW, I come from Shanghai. Welcome to Shanghai. I think at this moment you know what to do. Your suggestions to Albana are also the suggestions to yourself. hangout with friends, travel to somewhere and don’t stay at home alone. Hope you will get better soon.

Hi everyone,

I know this thread had been started 5 months ago already. I just want to see how you are coping this post break up period. My LDR of 3 years ended 2 months ago. I feel a lot better now than I initially did. But I still feel the slow burn of heartache at times and miss him terribly(even when I know he broke up with me for someone else). I stumbled across this thread and realized how many similarities we all share. It’d be nice to gain some insights into how your recovery journey has evolved. How are you feeling now? are you friends with your ex? got back together? or finally let go and feel indifferent towards him/her?

I’d be really grateful if you can share how your life has been unfolding and what you’ve learned from this lesson.

Lilia

Hello,
What do I do?

So I have been dating my current ex now for a short period of 2 months and it was long distance. We were hooked up by close friends in hopes of finding a lifetime partner. My understanding of that was that, we were both searching for marriage type of commitment. Within the first month of our courtship, he mentioned he wanted to be exclusive. I was happy to hear that. The following month, he asked me to be his girlfriend. Immediately after, that we broke up. I called things off because I stumbled upon a message from another woman pouring out her heart to him the first month we were together. I thought nothing of it because our relationship was something still very new. Maybe he hadn’t quite figured out what to do about that situation yet. I figured that eventually he would dismiss it since he didn’t seem to be paying much attention to her.

When he came to visit me, I noticed that the same person was still messaging him. Oppose to confronting him out right away, I asked for his phone (never ever again!) He kept saying it wasn’t an issue to see his phone but when he noticed how serious I was about seeing his phone, he changed his tone. I ended up dropping him off at the airport in a rude way and broke things off. Within 24 hours, he called to apologize for not allowing me see his phone but I wasn’t having that apology because he was apologizing for the wrong thing. After a few calls back and forth, he finally came clean about the other woman. I was willing to overlook simply because it was a new relationship, sometimes people have it harder letting go of their past. (At least that was my thought).

After he came clean, he disappeared on me. He barely called and now he’s completely stopped calling. I’ve reached out to him multiple times. He finally called me two weeks later after we broke up to say I wanted the apology in my own words. I tried to reason with him but whenever I tried, he shunned the conversation. I eventually told myself to stop calling him. He reached out to me a few days back but I was playing hard to get. I tried calling him the following day, we spoke briefly but he had to go stating he’d call back which he never did. Its been a month since we broke up and its been 3 days since we’ve had any dialogue with each other. What do i do? I can’t stop thinking about him..