Home→Forums→Tough Times→Seeking some support and encouragement
- This topic has 2 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 7 years, 3 months ago by Hopefaith.
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September 6, 2017 at 8:07 am #167324ShannonParticipant
Hi all,
I’ve always been a fan of Tiny Buddha’s loving, supportive, encouraging environment. I’m currently going through a hard time and am hoping for some support.
I’m 22 years-old and have struggled with depression on and off since I was 18. I got my heart broken the other day by someone I really connected to and cared about. I haven’t dated anyone in a few years and he was the first guy I really opened up to. Long story short – we met at a wedding, hit it off, and tried dating long-distance. He came on very strong – he made plans for the future and it seemed like his feelings were very strong for me. We did go through a brief period where he was concerned about us being long distance. We talked about it and things turned around. I was looking forward to seeing him soon and thought we’d reconnect when we could physically be together again. But suddenly his feelings changed (even though we were going to be seeing each other this weekend). He said he didn’t feel the connection anymore and ended things. It seemed to come out of nowhere and really hurt because I had been waiting for weeks to see him, and he ended it right before that happened. I really got my hopes up about us having a relationship. I have gotten my heart broken many times and I avoid relationships because of it. I was happy being alone before I met him, but now I miss having someone. I am so heartbroken and feel so alone.
I’m currently at a point in my life where I feel generally lost and unhappy. I have felt this way since graduating from college in 2016. I worked in a childcare job but recently quit because it became too stressful. I applied to graduate school but unfortunately did not get in. I’m looking to reapply this fall, but I’m very confused about what career to pursue. Right now, I’m taking some time to figure this out through job shadowing. My problem is I don’t know what will make me happy. I don’t know how to make big life decisions. I just feel overwhelmed, lost, and confused. I think my experience with the guy I was seeing brought me such happiness in the beginning – and since I lost it, I am feeling down. I have already set up an appointment with a counselor. I’m just trying to get through this. Any loving, supportive words would be truly appreciated.
September 6, 2017 at 8:44 am #167340AnonymousGuestDear Shannon:
I hope your appointment with a counselor helps you. If it does, maybe you can have a series of visits that will help guide you forward.
You wrote that you “don’t know how to make big life decisions”- it is tough to make big life decisions. The practice of making thoughtful small life decisions (like making an appointment with a counselor) is a good practice toward the making of big decisions.
Job shadowing, that is observing and maybe working with different employees for the goal of learning about their job, also reads like a good small life decision, a thoughtful choice.
I hope you focus on the small decisions, thoughtful small choices of every day, that is likely to decrease your anxiety and build your confidence in making bigger decisions. This applies not only to your studies and professional life but relationship life: thoughtfully, selectively choosing who you interact with and to what extent, starting small.
I hope you post again anytime and I hope others will respond as well with the support and encouragement that you need.
anita
September 6, 2017 at 12:03 pm #167406HopefaithParticipantHi I know how it feels and trust me no one can understand your pain because even I am trying to find answers and make my life better but if you can do one thing please search on butterfly boy you will get to know a boy who has worst skin disease he can’t even eat properly for him every day is struggle……he may never have a girlfriend,children,physical love or just say a normal life he has every reason to commit suicide or curse and yell at God why why why why why but he doesn’t…….trust me dear just live each day after sometime this pain will go till then it will hurt but slowly it will vanish too hope you will learn something after watching that video……just make one step to heal yourself
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