I have been friends with Jade for over 2 years. We knew of each other for a few years prior to this however we only got close when we found out we had a common interest. She was the friend who was always up for doing stuff and having great days out.

The last year I have noticed her becoming an absolute drain on my life to the point where I look forward to our day out being over before its even started. I noticed from early on she was quite dramatic, always had to be the most sickest (poorly/sick) person in the world at that current time and if you had a problem, it was never as bad as hers. This wasn’t too much of an issue – no one is perfect but it did start to drain on me eventually as I am quite a closed book and don’t broadcast my life story online (oh – the irony!) so I began to become less sympathetic with her and found her moans and negativity a constant drain and energy suck on my life.

When we would meet, it would be the Jade show – always had to be the loudest in public, always had to be spending the most money etc.

Anyway, the real cracks started to show when we decided to book a weekend away. Her behaviour seemed to get even worse. I took her to Brighton (UK) for a day out with afternoon tea, paid for travel etc and she moaned constantly and I just felt she unappreciated my efforts. Then came my Birthday and although I don’t give to receive she did not acknowledge my Birthday at all. Even to this day – 3 months later even though she knew I was having a weekend away with my boyfriend etc. But hey – no biggie..

Meeting up with her started to become difficult as I took a second job so I could afford to live but also have some money each month for myself to spend. My choice to do so. But it meant when she was free, I was working and then she would guilt trip me by saying she had planned her weekend around me so we could meet even though we had not planned to do anything and this was always 2 days beforehand so it wasn’t even like I could try and change my shifts. It was almost as if I felt owned by her and shouldn’t make plans when she was free otherwise I risk feeling guilty and like a terrible friend. This has now happened countless times.

I started to dread my weekend away with her which is in March 2018 because of her behaviour and I kept saying to my boyfriend that I couldn’t wait for it to be over.

When we booked the holiday I told her to do it through the holiday agency so I could pay back at my own rate except she went and put it on her credit card and said she would need £100 a month so its paid off quickly. To me this a lot of money but I could manage it and bit my tongue at how annoyed I was. I had paid off two months as agreed and then one morning she text me demanding the remaining money all in one heap. I told her I couldn’t afford to do this, otherwise I would be eating air for the next month – did she care? No. So I paid it all, expressed how upset I was and that she should not expect to see me that month as I could not afford to do anything. She then had the cheek to tell me that I usually have a busy social life and it wouldn’t do me any harm to have a quiet month!!

The dread was coming thicker and faster however, luckily enough, she decided she couldn’t go because she couldn’t afford it etc. I know the stress of money troubles so I understood even though I was a little disappointed at the fact we would possibly lose out on our £400 or a hefty deposit. She said if I could find someone else she would pay for change of names.. so I did! I think she secretly wanted me to beg her to go or wave my magic wand to make it all work out ok.

She then wanted all the money at once from my friend – it’s a month before Christmas! It was very stressful on my side because I didn’t want to pressure my other friend Anna yet Jade was being a complete cow. She wanted to change the names ASAP to save the charges getting high yet wouldn’t do it until she had the money and threatened to cancel the holiday if she didn’t have all the money within a week!!

Since then, as you can imagine, our friendship has not been good. And yet I feel guilty. Why? She is the most toxic friend I have ever met. Always put me down, always drained me and made me feel rubbish. I have been on a weightloss mission for a year and lost 3 stone and she always told me I didn’t look  like I had, judged my relationship, my home. Why do I feel guilty?? How do I stop?