WANTED: YOUR ADVICE FOR A GIRL I LOVE

For those that are curious this post is a follow up to a post i posted 4 months ago. Its been months since i have seen her as she got into another relationship. The months following her departure was an extremely emotional time for me. I thought of her frequently but as time took its course the emotional stress and pain i had felt diminished. During this time she had contacted me 4 times to talk and see how i am doing, all months apart. The first couple of phone calls it was awkward for the first few minutes. At first i was confused and questioned why she is calling me and if her boyfriend knows , her answer was no. By the 3rd and 4th phone call our talks went from 20 min calls to 3 hours, where we would reminisce about the good times we had and we would confess our love for one another. She would ask me things such as if i think things could ever go back the was things were. She seemed to be hesitant/not proud to call this person she was with her boyfriend, i found that so weird. Eventually, by the last phone call she told me that she is having difficulty opening up to her boyfriend because when she is with him she is thinking about me. Keep in mind there was a one month gap between each of these phone calls, it used to really bug me how we would talk for so long, say all these things and then hang up and not knowing the next time we would speak or if we ever would again.

A couple of weeks ago, she messaged me and asked if we could talk. I told her if you wanted to talk i am done speaking on the phone and would only do so at a coffee shop. She agreed to meet up. During our talk, she told me how she still loves me and was apologetic about what she had done 4 months ago. I was extremely pissed off because during that time i told her that i loved her so much and i wanted to take our relationship to another level and she had told me it is to late “there is someone else in the picture and if you wanted to be with me you would have committed to me in the year and half you had”.

The same day of our meet up she had broken things of with her boyfriend and him that she still loved me and was unable to continue with him. Following this event she wanted me to commit to her but wanted reassurance it would lead to marriage and i told her that you need to give me some time to digest all this. I explained to her that she had broken my heart and really upset me that i don’t know if i could even trust her again yet alone forgive her.

We have gradually been seeing each other/talking more and more and i had told her that it is extremely hard for me to forgive her as she really hurt me. But because i value what we had and lover her i am to put it behind me. We have been seeing other but things are not like they were in the past because I can sense that she is holding back her feelings. She seems confused and hesitant to commit as she is not sure what to do. She says “there are two guys that want to be with her (the other guy being her x) and she is unsure if it is going to work with me mainly due to religious differences and culture.

As it currently stands I have told her a couple of times now that i want to be with her and i want to marry her. I explained to her that nothing will get in the way between us if you are willing to put your hand in my hand and embark on this journey together. There will a few things we need to figure out, but to just trust me.

Here i am willing to give this girl my all and commit to her, the premise of why things ended initially and she cant give me a straight answer. I am very confused because i do not want to continue seeing her and hanging out with her feeling this emotional distress of not knowing where we stand and that she might do.

Some advice would be greatly appreciated