What to Do When You've Hurt a Friend.

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  • #166022

    Hey Everyone,

    I’ve really been struggling lately. A couple weekends ago, I drank too much, which I do not do often, and hurt a good friend of mine.

    In my ridiculous blacked out state apparently I got mad at her and hip checked her over. She is recovering from knee surgery and she said that since the incident she’s been having issues with her knee clicking and locking. I am absolutely ashamed and heart broken that I would do this to a friend even when I don’t remember any of these events. I have zero doubt that actually hurting her was just an extremely unfortunate conscience, as I would never maliciously try to hurt someone.

    I have already decided to take a long hiatus from drinking, and have apologized 100 times to her but any advice on what else to do would be appreciated. How can I start to make it up to her? How can I forgive myself as I’ve been completely sick since the incident with guilt and self hatred.


    Thank you,



    • This topic was modified 6 years, 9 months ago by Brittany.

    Now you learned your lesson of being drank.


    Dear Brittany:

    You wrote: “I would never maliciously try to hurt someone”- we have to do our best, as human beings, not to hurt someone maliciously or not maliciously. Hurting someone by an act of inattention and neglect is still hurting someone and it is our responsibility to minimize the chances of doing so. An example of hurting someone not with malice but because of inattention is texting while driving. When a person dies as a result of another driver texting while driving, the person is dead regardless of there not being malice.

    You asked what you can do regarding hurting your friend’s knee- you can offer her a financial compensation and/or to do physical chores for her, such as to clean her home, her car, do errands for her, etc.



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