Hey Nicole,

I just wanted to share my opinions with you on this topic, so please take the following as my opinion and not as fact.

I wanted to say first I think your feelings of wanting happiness and fulfillment are totally normal. I think a lot of people, especially Americans, feel alienated, unconnected, and unfulfilled, since that’s the kind of culture we live in. You’re not alone. Even though we’re ultimately alone – and that’s okay – we’re not really alone.

I also believe we are ultimately connected by some greater power/spirit, myself, though I have no idea what it is, just that I can feel it. And as Neil DeGrasse Tyson points out in Cosmos, at the most basic fundamental level, we are truly, literally, physically, ONE.

Because of this, and because so many of our sisters and brothers and fellow beings suffer so incredibly tremendously, and because I think people have tendencies toward compassion and a need for contribution to the world and solidarity, I argue that, besides human connection and belonging, what many folks are missing is SERVICE to others. I advocate for activism/social justice work as a form of service work to fulfill our need for contribution in the world AND to actually improve the world for all people and beings, to spread the love and peace that makes us feel more whole.

I do activist recruitment in Atlanta, GA – trying to help people find issues that their passionate about and help them start (and keep) working on these issues to improve the world and find fulfillment for themselves. There are endless issues to work on – can you think of any that strike you? – and many have been urgent for a long time now, like climate change. We truly need you, and everyone, in the Movement to literally save the world.

I also work to create the political and public will to end hunger and poverty on Earth through a group called RESULTS (results.org), where we directly lobby our members of Congress about proven, cost-effective solutions to address the worst aspects of poverty. For example, we’re working to get early cosponsors (especially Republicans) onto a Senate bill that would create a US strategy for ending preventable pregnancy-related maternal and child deaths by 2035 (currently at 289,000 and 6.3 million every year, respectively) in part by reforming USAID in line with recommendations by a recent panel on how it can be more efficient and effective with the money it is given toward this goal of ending preventable child and maternal deaths on Earth in the next 20 years. So that’s one of the main orgs I work with, and I couldn’t feel more fulfilled there.

So again to recap, I think it’s normal to feel disconnected and unsure what to do with your life; we are alone and yet we need belonging and connection; I feel like we’re all ultimately connected, physically if not spiritually; and I think we have a need to contribute to improving the world, and I recommend social justice activism as a GREAT way to do that. YOU are already powerful and we need your voice in the Movement.

I wanted to share a couple videos that I have found helpful or awesome, one about how to be alone that was very comforting to me, and one about RESULTS, which I think is a good representation of who we are.

Good luck, sister! I hope to see you in the struggle! 🙂

Dear Nicole,

You are way ahead of most people your age 🙂

Don’t be so hard on yourself !

You are just coming out of a relationship and your soul is asking you to take some time to figure out your next steps in life. At the same time, your mind is feeling out of place/left out/alone since you are not in a relationship !!

Take it one day at a time – the answers will come to you soon.

GOD bless !!!

Hi Nicole

Your hunger and desire to live a fulfilling and enjoyable life after the difficult and hurtful experience you have had is truly inspiring. There are so many in your situation who would use it as an excuse to turn against the world, or just settle for whatever life throws at them as if they had no control over it.

Someone with your outlook on life is always likely to feel a little bit hungry for more, but that is a good thing – it will keep you going through hard times, and will enable you to achieve far more than you could dream of.

From reading your posts it is clear that you have come through your experience with strength, maturity and dignity. Now it is time to focus on yourself and become Nicole again. It might seem scary and strange at first, but once you start, your attitude will make you unstoppable.